


On the Roof

by Tasha_T



Category: Original Work
Genre: F/F, Femslash, Lesbian
Language: English
Status: In-Progress
Published: 2020-12-04
Updated: 2020-12-04
Packaged: 2021-03-09 18:01:46
Rating: Teen And Up Audiences
Warnings: No Archive Warnings Apply
Chapters: 12
Words: 40,265
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/27880426
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/Tasha_T/pseuds/Tasha_T
Summary: Liv's new in town and currently living in a bad situation.  She's frustrated and scared, until she meets Nik, another resident in her building, who helps her out.





	1. Chapter 1

I took my laptop and headed on up to the roof to try and get some studying done. I was so pissed off, though, I was having serious trouble concentrating. 

I’d come to the city to attend college. I was very serious about it. I had a partial scholarship, so I had some of my costs covered, but I wasn’t exactly rolling in money. I was working part time at the Office Depot around the corner, just so I’d have money for food and stuff, and I’d agreed to share an apartment with my cousin, Lindsey, who worked in the city. What a mistake that was proving to be.

Since I’d moved in, I’d found that her boyfriend pretty lived in the apartment, and him and his bro’s were always there, watching TV, playing video games, drinking, smoking pot and generally just being assholes. 

Not a day went by when either the boyfriend or one of his buddies didn’t suggest maybe I’d like to ‘do it’ with them. 

They were annoying enough just hanging out there, let alone coming on to me all the time. And I really worried one of them might just decide some day not to take my ‘no’ for an answer. They all seemed like kind of sketchy guys, so I really didn’t think I was being paranoid.

That’s why I went up to the roof. I’d just discovered the spot about a week ago. No one ever went up there, so I could have some alone time to get things done or to just get away from those assholes. I was getting worried, though. I knew winter was coming, and then where would I go? 

I’d tried talking to my cousin, but of course she didn’t see the problem. She just told me to relax and not be so up-tight all the time. I wanted to say, “Fuck you!” and just storm out of there, but I had nowhere else to go. I felt trapped and frustrated and angry.

It didn’t do much to improve my mood when I heard the roof door open. Someone else had discovered my sanctuary. That just pissed me off even more. I was fully expecting it to be one of the guys from our apartment. I thought maybe he’d followed me up there. That made me angry . . . and then, after a few seconds of thought, it kind of scared me.

I looked around. There was only one way off the roof and that was back through the door. I was kind of trapped.

I stood up and was getting ready to vent all my pent up anger and frustration at whichever asshole had invaded my private space. I tensed and did my best to push down my fears. I readied a positively vicious glare. I wasn’t going to take this shit anymore.

That’s when a dark haired woman walked around the corner. She stopped when she saw me. She took one look at my face and said, “Fuck . . . sorry! What’s your problem?”

I immediately felt like such a bitch. I held up my hands to let her know I didn’t mean any offense. “Oh my god . . . I’m so sorry. I thought it was someone else. I’m. . . I’m really, really sorry.”

It took a few long seconds for the look on her face to soften. Finally, though, she shrugged and gave me a crooked little smile. 

“Looks like you’ve got a major hate-on for someone. Glad I’m not him . . . I assume it’s some guy.”

“Yeah. Well, it’s a few guys. They’re all fucking assholes. I thought one of them had followed me up here.”

My little tirade seemed to surprise her. I could see it on her face. I guess I have a bit of a sweet look to me. I usually am a sweet person, but I can be a major bitch if it’s called for.

After her initial reaction, she gave me a big smile. “That’s it, girl . . . don’t hold back.”

I actually smiled. It was nice to be able to vent, even if it was to a total stranger. I really didn’t have anyone around who I could share all my anger and frustration with. I knew keeping it in only made it worse, but I didn’t seem to have an alternative.

“Let me guess,” she said. “It’s those assholes down on the fourth floor. The ones that think they’re God’s gift to women. What a bunch of losers.”  
I nodded. “Oh, yeah, those are the ones.”

“So they’ve been hitting on you too?” She sounded nearly as pissed at them as I did.

I took a deep breath. “Yeah,” I replied, and I was surprised to hear a tremble in my voice. “But for me it’s even worse . . . because they’re actually hanging out in the apartment I’m sharing with my cousin.”

This had all been building up in me over the last month. Maybe I didn’t realize just how much it had affected me. Now that I was finally letting it out, though, it was kind of like a dam bursting.

I could feel tears welling up in my eyes. I fought hard to hold them back. I didn’t want to start crying in front of a total stranger. I looked away, pulled my glasses off and wiped at my eyes. Whatever I wiped away, though, was quickly replaced by more tears. As much as I tried to stop it, in another minute I had a flood of big hot tears running down my face.

“Hey, are you okay,” I heard the woman say. There was genuine concern in her voice . . . which I thought was nice.

I just nodded. I had turned so I had my back to her. I didn’t want to speak and I refused to look at her. I didn’t want to admit to anyone that I wasn’t as strong as I thought I should be.

I didn’t even hear her, but suddenly I felt her wrap her arms around me. She was a little tentative at first, but I guess when I didn’t draw away she decided I really needed it and she hugged me tightly.

“It’s okay,” she said softly as those big tears continued to run down my face.

It took me a few minutes to get myself under control again. I felt embarrassed, just crying like that. I did feel a little better, though. I guess it was good to be able to let it all out for a change.

“Thanks,” I finally said. I felt a little sheepish. It was a strange situation. 

She let me go and I wiped my eyes again.

I turned to her and gave her a shy look. “I’m really sorry. I didn’t mean to . . . ,” I started but she just waved me off.

She gave me a little smile. “It’s no big deal. Sometimes we all need a shoulder to cry on.”

She was looking me over, I’m sure trying to decide if I was going to break down again. It suddenly dawned on me that maybe she thought I was up on the roof because I was suicidal or something. 

“Uh, I just come up here because it’s a nice quiet place to get away,” I blurted out.

She gave me a little nod, but never took her dark eyes off of me. “Yeah, me too. I like to come up here and watch the sun set . . . clear my head . . . kind of get all the stress from the day out of my system.”

Now it was my turn to nod. “Yeah, it’s nice up here.” As I spoke I turned and let my eyes wander off towards the south, where the trees of the park were visible.  
The two of us stood there, quietly, just enjoying the view for a long time. 

Finally I heard her ask, “Did you want to talk about it?”

I looked over at her. I was a little surprised by her question. My immediate response was to say, “Oh, no. I . . . I don’t want to . . . .” 

I didn’t finish the sentence. I wasn’t sure what I wanted to say. I didn’t want to trouble her with my problems, or I didn’t want to take up her time, or I didn’t feel comfortable sharing with someone I didn’t even know, or . . . or something. 

That was my first response. But I quickly realized, deep down, that I really did want to share my problems with someone. I wanted to talk it out. I didn’t know if that would really make it better, but I kind of suspected that just being able to talk about it would help me deal with it. 

I looked up at her. She was looking at me intently. Her face seemed to show genuine concern. 

“Are you sure?” I asked in a very small voice. I really did want to talk about it, but I was still reluctant to force some complete stranger to listen to my problems.

She gave me a little smile. “I work as a nurse’s aide at the VA. Half of what I do is listening to what people have to say. It’s amazing how therapeutic it can be . . . just being able to talk to someone about what’s going on in your head. I think my listening does as much for the people there as all the other stuff we do for them.”

I was a little surprised. I would never have guessed she was a nurse . . . or worked at the VA. Something about the way she looked just seemed out of sync – at least in my mind – with what I’d expect for someone in that kind of role. It seems we all have our subtle prejudices.

It was almost like she could read my mind. 

She crossed her arms and her face grew stony. Her voice was frosty as she spoke. “You don’t think I look right for that kind of job?”

I got the immediate impression I wasn’t the first person who’d given her that look, and I could see she was a little defensive about it.

“No . . . I guess that’s not the kind of thing I imagined you being.” 

I think my response kind of shocked her. I can’t help myself . . . I tend to be unapologetically honest. I have trouble lying, even if I’m only doing it to spare someone’s feelings. I really believe in being honest. And honestly, when I looked at this woman, nurse’s aide at a VA hospital was not what immediately came to mind.

She had shoulder length, dyed black hair, a little nose ring, and a full sleeve of tattoos running down her right arm. In her tank top, ripped jeans and army boots, she really didn’t have the look I would have expected. 

“Just the way you look, I would have guessed you were, like, a designer or a musician or an artist or something. You know, working in some real creative field.”  
I shrugged. “No offense. That was just my first impression.”

She seem like she was mulling this over, maybe trying to decide if she should be offended.

After a second, I added, “But I can see that you’re really caring.” A little smile found its way onto my face. “And obviously you have a talent for getting people to open up and share their feelings. So I bet you’re great at your job.”

I wasn’t lying or trying to win her over. What I’d just said was more based on my – somewhat limited – direct experience with her. My best friends couldn’t have been more caring and supportive of me. 

I realized that the way she had stepped up and helped me – when she didn’t need to and, let’s be honest, when I had no expectation that anyone in that position would – spoke volumes about the type of person she really was.

It suddenly dawned on me – a little late, unfortunately – that my initial reaction was based solely on how she looked. I felt like such an idiot. Wasn’t that the problem with so many prejudices – both positive and negative? They were based solely on outward appearances. I felt horrible.

“I’m so sorry,” I told her. I was totally sincere. “I really try not to judge people on how they look . . . but I guess I totally did that with you.” My eyes fell and my whole body sagged. I couldn’t even look at her . . . especially after she’d gone out of her way to help me. I sounded miserable as I said, “I feel terrible.” 

After a second I turned and reached for my laptop. I needed to retreat. I felt so bad.

“Hold on,” I heard her say. 

I paused and glanced up at her. She looked a little conflicted. After a second she turned her eyes to me. 

“I think . . . maybe . . . I kind of over-reacted,” she said. “It’s just . . . .”

She furrowed her brow. I could sense her frustration. It was a feeling I was oh so familiar with these days. So I finished her sentence for her. “ . . . people decide you’re not right for that job just because of the way you look.”

She nodded. 

“And that makes you frustrated . . . because you really care about your job. And because you’re really good at your job.”

Now I saw a little smile begin at the corner of her lips. She gave me a look that seemed to say she appreciated that I understood. 

“I thought I was the one up her helping you with your problems,” she said lightly as her smile grew. 

It was infections. I found myself smiling back at her. “You did help me . . . and you only got upset because of my stupidity. I really am sorry about that.”

She waved off my apology. “We’re good,” she said. She looked at me intently again. “Now did you want to sit down and have that talk about your problems.”

I couldn’t help smiling. After all that, she still wanted to help me. It made me feel even a little worse about my blunder. 

I did decide, right then, that this was a person I really wanted to have as a friend. Again, based on appearance, with her dyed hair, nose ring and tattoos, she really didn’t look like the type of person I would typically gravitate towards. I was beyond that kind of shallow thinking, though. She was clearly a wonderful person. Why wouldn’t anybody want a friend like that?

I held out my hand. “I’m Olivia Schaefer. My friends just call me Liv.”

She smiled and took my hand. “Nichole Harris,” she replied. “Most people call me Nik.”

“Not Nikki?”

She seemed to grimace. “Definitely not Nikki!” She was quite adamant. “It’s Nichole or Nik. Or Ms. Harris, if we want to keep it formal.”

I found myself grinning. “How about Harry?” I teased.

She rolled her eyes and grinned back at me. “Another definite no to that.”

Neither one of us spoke for a few seconds as we shared a lighter moment. Finally I said, “Okay, since you’re being difficult, then Nik it is.”

“So, you’re a real comedian when you’re not planning how you’re going to kill all the guys in your apartment, hey?

“Even us psychos can have a sense of humor.” 

It felt so good having someone to joke with like this. I realized that besides all the apartment issues, this was something else I was seriously missing since I’d started college. 

It was kind of ironic . . . there were thousands of people on the campus, but when you were in and out of lectures with a hundred or more other people, it was kind of hard to connect with anyone. 

I’d gotten spoiled in my little home town, where I’d known more than half the kids in my graduating class since elementary school. Had I really forgotten how to make new friends, or had I just not put any effort into it since I’d moved? I looked over and smiled. At least I’d found Nik.

Nik and I sat down, and I told her all my woes. She really was a wonderful listener and I found I really was feeling a lot better after talking to her. We didn’t exactly come up with any solutions . . . other than her suggestion that I put rat poison in their food. She said she’d help me bag them up and throw them down the garbage chute. She assured me they wouldn’t be missed. I couldn’t help laughing . . . maybe a little too much. Was that a Freudian slip or something?

Finally Nik looked at me very seriously. “You know, if it ever gets too bad up there, I have a couch and you’re welcome to crash on it. I’m just downstairs from you . . . 301. Anytime . . . day or night . . . if you’re feeling like you really need to get out of there, the couch is yours . . . for as long as you need it.”

It was such a generous offer that I could barely contain my appreciation. “That’s really so sweet,” I told her. I think I kind of felt those tears welling up in my eyes again . . . but out of gratitude this time. I couldn’t restrain myself. I gave her a big hug and said, “Thank you so much. This means so much to me. You really are the most wonderful person I know.”

I was gushing so much, I guess, that I embarrass her. When I let go of her and sat back, she was actually blushing a bit. She turned her eyes away from me. 

I just gave her a big, appreciative smile. I might have teased her about the blushing on another occasion, but I really wasn’t going to do it right now when she was being so kind to me.

After we got through all my drama, we continued talking. It wasn’t about anything in particular, but it seemed we both were enjoying each other’s company. 

Finally I saw her eyes drift off to the west. “Look at that,” she said as she nodded in that direction. “That’s why I love coming up here. It’s just so beautiful.”

I turned and looked. The sun was setting and it was truly magnificent. The sky was painted in pinks and purples that changed continuously as the sun sank lower on the horizon. 

Nik slipped an arm around my shoulder and gave me a little hug. “Watching that . . . I forget about all my troubles. My head just fills up with that image and I don’t have any room left for all those negative thoughts. Even if it’s only for half an hour or whatever . . . it’s refreshing to just clear my mind . . . to let go of any stress, anything that’s been eating at me . . . and just take in that view.”

I wasn’t sure if it was the view, Nik’s dreamy words, or just being there and enjoying the warmth of her company, but I knew that was the best I’d felt in a long time. For the first time in a month, I was actually feeling hopeful that everything was going to work out.


	2. Chapter 2

My newfound bliss was short lived. Two nights later – Friday – the boyfriend and his bro’s were as bad as ever. Lindsey was working an evening shift, so I didn’t expect to see her until after midnight. And it seemed the boys had started partying early. 

I got home around four and they were already acting quite rude and wasted. I’d brought home some Chinese food, so I grabbed it, my coat and my laptop and headed up to the roof to escape those losers. I got nothing but lewd comments as I walked through the apartment and out the door.

Nik had told me she was working an eight to eight shift through the weekend, so I knew she wouldn’t be up there to share the sunset with me. That was unfortunate, because I really could have used a hug from her to help bolster my spirits.

I just ate my food, did some work on my computer and watched the sunset. Nik had been right . . . it was refreshing just emptying my mind and letting the colors of the setting sun fill my head with its beauty. By the time the sun finally disappeared below the horizon and night began to set in, I felt much more relaxed.

Once the sun was down, though, I found the night was starting to feel much chillier than it had even a few weeks earlier. I knew time was running out on me and my secret sanctuary. 

Finally by about nine I was chilled enough that I had to head back to the apartment. I stalked through the living room to the same lewd, suggestive comments I’d heard when I’d left. I slammed the bedroom door as I retreated into my room. It hadn’t take long for my anger and frustration to return.

I had to work in the morning, and I had to be in by seven-forty five, so I went to bed about ten thirty. I put earbuds in and cranked up my music to drown out the sounds from the other room.

It took a while, but I finally drifted off to sleep. I wasn’t sure how long I’d slept for, but suddenly I woke up. I was a little groggy and had no idea what had woken me. I glanced around my room, trying to figure it out. Suddenly I froze. I saw a figure silhouetted in my open door. My heart was pounding wildly and I felt instant terror. I realize it was Craig, one of the bro’s and a real asshole. He seemed to be standing there, swaying, looking over in my direction. 

I suddenly felt so angry – almost violated – having this moron invade my personal space. I leapt out of bed and screamed, “What the fuck do you think you’re doing!” I ran at him and gave him a vicious shove in the chest. Craig was bigger than me, but I guess I surprised him, and besides, he wasn’t too steady on his feet in his condition. He stumbled backwards, bounced off the wall, and then half spun and tumbled into the living room where all his buddies were.

I heard them all yelling, like, “Hey, Craig, what the fuck, man.” 

He was just crawling back to his feet when I rounded the corner into the living room. I was so mad that I really wasn’t thinking straight. My face I’m sure was a mask of pure rage as I ran my eyes over the collection of idiots in the room. 

They all stared at me dumbly for a few long seconds, and then I started screaming. “Don’t you fucking assholes ever come into my room again. The next fucker who tries it is going to lose his fucking balls. Do you hear me.”

I glared at them and gritted my teeth. Suddenly the thought of sending their dead bodies down the garbage chute in plastic bags was sounding quite good.

I’d hoped I’d made a point, but when the shock of the whole thing wore off, the assholes started laughing. 

They looked over at Craig, who was standing now, but still looking plenty unsteady. “Yo, Craig, man, were you trying to make friends with Luscious Livie, man?” one of them laughed, which got the others going too. 

“Don’t you know, man, she’s a fucking ice queen. You stick your cock in there, I think you’ll probably get frost bite.”

“Craig, man, don’t feel bad. I hear she don’t do men. I hear she’s a fucking dyke.”

“Hey, Craig, how far you get with her, man? You get a grab of those tasty tits of hers, man? Yeah, they’re fine, hey? I wouldn’t mind burying my face in there, that’s for sure.”

I felt so offended and violated listening to these assholes. I was almost in tears and I wanted to get out of there.

To add to it, Craig seemed to be getting wound up from all the encouragement from his buddies.

“Hey sweet Livie,” he called. When I turned my eyes to him he grinned. “Are you sure you don’t want a bit,” he said, and then began thrusting his hips almost violently. “Come on girl, you know you want it. I’ll give it to you good, sweet thing. I’ll make you moan ‘til you’re waking up all the neighbors.” He started thrusting his hips again while the other guys all laughed.

I was mortified. I ran back to my room and slammed the door. I sat on the edge of my bed, crying. My whole body was shaking . . . from anger . . . and I knew from fear also. I looked over at the door. I’d thought a few times about changing the handle to one that locked. I’d just thought that wasn’t really necessary. Now I was cursing myself.

“Fuck, I’ve got to get out of here,” I said out loud. I didn’t dare start peeling off clothes to change, so I grabbed a robe, my glasses and my purse. I had visions of the boys plotting to make their way down to my room and have their way with me. It was terrifying. I quietly opened my door. Luckily for me, they were too drunk and stupid to organize anything like that . . . at least so far. 

I shot through the living room before anyone could do anything. I heard a few more comments, but I blocked them out. I was out of the apartment door in a second. I hoped to God none of them were trying to follow me. I ran to the stairs, rushed down, and then sprinted down the hallway until I saw 301. 

I knocked on the door. I took a quick look over my shoulder to reassure myself that no one was behind me, and then knocked again. 

My heart was pounding wildly. I don’t think I’d ever been that terrified in my life. I was just going to start pounding again when the door swung open. I was so relieved to see Nik standing there. She looked like I’d woken her, but there must have been something about the look on my face, because she suddenly seemed very alert. She grabbed my arm, yanked me into her apartment and slammed the door behind me.

She grabbed me by the shoulders and peered into my eyes. “Are you okay, Liv,” she asked softly. I could hear the concern in her voice.

I shook my head and then fell against her and started crying. This wasn’t the soft gently flowing tears I’d had up on the roof. I was sobbing and my whole body was shaking as she held me tightly.

She ran her hand lightly through my hair and in a quiet, comforting voice told me, “It’s okay, Liv. You’re safe here. Really, it’s going to be okay.”

It probably took me half an hour to calm down. Nik sat me down on her couch and held me tightly until I finally got control of myself. I told her what had happened. Just talking about it brought back the tears. I found myself shaking too, I was so wound up. She listened attentively, and offered comfort. 

“You’re definitely staying here tonight,” she said firmly. 

I wasn’t going to argue. I just gave her an appreciative hug. “What the hell would I do if I hadn’t met her?” I wondered. It was a terrifying thought.

“You should move out of that place . . . tomorrow,” she insisted. “Like I told you, you can stay here as long as you want.”

She glanced around. “I can probably move my stuff around and make space for you in the back bedroom. I’ve got my crap all over the place back there, but I’m sure if I cleaned it up, there’d be plenty of room for you.”

“Really, I don’t want to impose . . . ,” I started, but she just gave me a hard look. 

“You’re not staying another night up there,” she said. She was staring intently into my eyes, and I could see her steely resolve. It wasn’t a suggestion. She was just telling me the way it was going to be, and I had no say in it. 

Normally I’d bristle at someone trying to tell me what I could and couldn’t do, but in this case, all I did was give her another long hug and whisper, “Thank you . . . so much.”

After a few reassuring minutes of letting her just hold me, she said, “You should really try and get some sleep. You have to work tomorrow, don’t you?” I guess at some point I’d mentioned that to her.

I just nodded and said, “Yeah.” 

By then it had been over an hour since I’d arrived at Nik’s place. I was feeling safe and sane again. I think all my fears had pumped me full of adrenaline, but now that I was past all that, I just felt drained.

I reluctantly let Nik get up from the couch. She grabbed a pillow and a couple of blankets for me. She had me peel off my robe and put my glasses on the coffee table, and then I stretched out on the couch while she tucked me in. 

“Is this going to be okay for you?” She was still watching me closely. I could see the concern on her face.

I nodded. “Yeah, I think so.” I did feel tired. I realized I had no idea what time it was, but I knew Nik was right and I needed to get some sleep.

She turned off the light, but with the curtains open, the room wasn’t completely dark. “I’ll just be right in here if you need me,” she said as she walked over to the door of her bedroom. She paused there in the doorway. “Really, if you need anything, just call.” She was giving more orders, and I was only too happy for it.

I nodded at her, and then closed my eyes. I took a deep breath and tried to put this nightmare evening behind me. But then I heard a noise and I jumped. My mind was racing again as I peered around in the semi-dark. I realized it was just the fridge, but knowing that didn’t seem to calm me. I felt tense. I heard a sound from outside and I jumped again. I knew – logically – that I was perfectly safe here in Nik’s apartment. I knew I could just doze off and I’d be just fine. But it seemed my brain wasn’t listening to logic. When I heard a noise from out in the hallway – someone slammed a door – I jumped again and let out a little cry. 

“That’s it. Come on, get up.”

I was startled to hear Nik’s voice. Apparently she’d been standing just inside her doorway, in the dark, watching me. 

“Come on,” she insisted. “Tonight I think you need to sleep in here with me. 

I sat up and looked over at her. She’d stepped into the half light of the living room and stared intently at me again. 

“I don’t want to . . . ,” I started weakly, but Nik just cut me off.

“Look, what you went through tonight was like a trauma. You need to deal with that. And both of us need to get some sleep, because I have to work tomorrow too.” Her voice softened and I could hear her compassion. “If you need me to be there to help you feel safe, then I’m happy to do it. But the only way we can do that and get some sleep is if you’re in here with me.”

She walked over to the couch, took my hand, and led me into her bedroom. She laid me down and tucked me in, and then circled around to the other side of the bed. She crawled in, slid right up behind me and wrapped her arms tightly around me. 

“There,” she whispered in my ear. “How is that?

I turned my head and gave her an appreciative smile. “Thank you,” I told her. I’d never meant those two words more ever before in my life. I knew I was just so lucky to have Nik, totally there for me on this awful night. 

I closed my eyes and found myself snuggling back against her. I really did feel safer now. I was back to feeling exhausted. In no time I found myself drifting.


	3. Chapter 3

I’d like to say I had a pleasant, peaceful sleep, but that really wasn’t the case. I woke up – startled out of my dreams – a number of times. My heart was racing, although I didn’t know why. I think most of it was from dreams I was having, but thankfully I didn’t really remember them. 

Every time I woke, though, I found Nik’s comforting arms around me and her warm body pressed against me. They were so reassuring. I’d carefully snuggled against her, trying not to disturb her, and then soon find myself drifting back to sleep.

Eventually, I felt myself being gently shaken awake and heard Nik softly calling my name. I opened my heavy eyelids to see her standing over me. She gave me a big smile. That was a welcome sight first thing in the morning, I decided.

“How are you this morning?” she asked. There was obvious concern in her voice, which I truly appreciated. I realized once again that she was probably awesome at her job at the VA.

I gave her a smile of my own. “Tired,” I told her. “Can’t I sleep . . . I don’t know . . . maybe another ten hours?”

She laughed softly. “Sorry, lazy bones, I think it’s time for you to get up. Remember, you have to work today.”

I nodded at her, but my eyes had drifted closed again. “Come on, Liv.” She gave me another gentle shake.

I reluctantly swung my legs out of the bed and sat up, but my eyes were still closed. 

I sat there. I knew Nik was right there, but she was silent, and I sensed she was very still. I opened my eyes to see her staring at me. She looked very serious.

In a quiet voice she said, “There’s probably some things we need to do before we head off to work.”

Her tone caught my attention. We locked eyes. I could sense she was maybe a little tense.

It took her a few seconds, but finally she spoke. “We have to go and get your stuff from your apartment.”

I felt a little shudder run through my body. The thought of going back to that place, after the events of the previous night, just resurrected all my fears. I found myself shaking my head. My heart was racing and I was feeling panicky. 

Nik stepped forward, knelt down in front of me so she was at my eye level, and took my hand. She gave it a reassuring squeeze. “Don’t worry, I’m going with you.” I could hear the steel in her voice, and that helped. She followed that with a little grin. “Besides, I’m sure those assholes are all passed out at this time of the morning. We’ll be in and out and they’ll never even know it.” Her grin broadened as she added, “And if you happen to stomp on someone’s balls while they’re passed out, well . . . you know . . . accidents happen.”

That actually brought a smile to my face.

“You have to get your stuff for work, at least, I guess, but I think you should just grab everything we can carry and get it out of there.” 

I nodded, which earned me a smile. 

“Do you have a suitcase or anything upstairs that we can pack your stuff into?

I shook my head. “I just have my school backpack and a little overnight bag. I brought most of my stuff in boxes.”

Nik gave me a reassuring little smile. “That’s fine.” She glanced over by the door to her bedroom and I saw a large suitcase standing there. “Hopefully we can pack everything into that,” she said, nodding at it.

I nodded. I didn’t have that much stuff – mainly just clothes – and I thought we could fit them all in.

When we got to the apartment, my hand was trembling so much I had trouble getting the key into the door lock. Nik took it from me without a word and let us in. She was right about the assholes. There was one on the couch and one sprawled in a chair, but they were both snoring loudly and unaware that we were there. I could hear snoring from Lindsey’s room too. I had no idea where the fourth asshole was, but I prayed that he hadn’t decided to take advantage of my unoccupied bed.

Luckily, when we made it to my room, it was empty. Nik threw the large suitcase on the bed and we quickly stuffed everything I owned into it. I snuck down the hallway to the bathroom and grabbed my toiletries, and then packed all my school stuff in my backpack and we were out of there. The only other things that were mine were the bedroom clock and a small reading lamp, and those fit easily in the suitcase.

When we were finally back in Nik’s apartment I heaved a huge sigh of relief. I turned to her and watched as she wheeled the large suitcase over against the wall out of the way.

When she turned around she saw me looking at her. I was giving her a huge, happy smile. She froze for a second. She looked a little uncomfortable. “What?” she finally asked.

I didn’t say anything. I just walked over to her, paused while I shared that smile with her, and then gave her a huge hug. “Thank you so much,” I gushed as I squeezed her tightly.

She seemed almost a little flustered. “I . . . that’s fine, I . . . really, I didn’t do anything.”

I leaned back so I could look her in the eye. “That’s not true,” I told her in a solemn voice. “If you weren’t there for me last night, I don’t know what I would have done.” My eyes drifted down. In a quiet voice I added, “I really don’t know what might have happened to me.”

It took me a second before I decided that was something I really didn’t even want to ponder. I looked back up into her dark eyes. “You saved me. You were there when I really needed someone. You took me in and held me and made me feel safe again.” I knew I was being a little melodramatic, but I just couldn’t help myself. 

I could feel tears welling up in my eyes again. “You’re just so wonderful. I don’t know how I can ever repay you.”

I hugged her again. For a second I hoped I wasn’t making her too uncomfortable, but then I felt her arms slip around me and she hugged me right back. That made me smile, in spite of the tears running down my face.

We stayed that way for a long time. Eventually I let her go and stepped back. I’d stopped crying, finally, so I wiped the tears that were still on my face.

“God, every time you see me I’m crying,” I said and offered her a weak smile. “You must think I’m a total basket case.”

Nik reached up and gently ran her hand over my cheek. I guess there was a tear still there that I’d missed. “I know you’re not a basket case. You stood up to those assholes, and then you had the brains to get out of there before anything happened. I’d say that just makes you a strong, smart woman who doesn’t put up with other people’s shit.”

She gave me a bright smile. “And that sounds like the kind of woman I’d like to be friends with.”

That made me smile.

After a few seconds she got more serious. “I meant what I said. You’re welcome to stay here as long as you want. I’ve got that second bedroom. Like I said, it’s kind of full of my crap, but I think we can clean it out enough for you to stay there, if you want.”

I gave her a big, appreciative smile. I knew I was so very lucky to have met her right when I did. “With this kind of luck, maybe I should be buying a lotto ticket,” I was thinking.

To Nik I said, “You’re so generous . . . but I’m not going to hold you to that. You don’t even know me. I might drive you crazy after a couple of days. For all you know, I’m some kind of psycho. I might be the kind of person who borrows your clothes without asking, or who drinks right out of the milk jug, and then puts it back in the fridge when it’s empty.”

Okay, maybe I was just listing off things that would really bug me.

I was being a little less serious. I really wanted to lighten the mood. I was out of that apartment from hell and I honestly wanted to move on and never think about it again.

Apparently my attempt at humor was working, because Nik was smiling now too.

She arched an eyebrow at me and gave me a sideways look. “Well, for all you know, I’m the psycho . . . preying on poor, distraught women. Maybe I’ll end up chaining you to the radiator . . . and, who knows, force you to. . . .” Her eyes strayed to the kitchen area. “. . . wash all my dirty dishes.”

I glance over towards the kitchen. There was a healthy stack of dirty dishes piled in the sink and on the counter.

I looked back at her. I held her eyes with mine. I smiled warmly and in a quiet voice simply said, “I don’t mind washing dishes.” 

I didn’t bother adding, “It’s the least I can do, considering all you’ve done for me.” I could have gone on and on trying to express my overwhelming appreciation to her, but I was pretty sure she understood that by now.

We stood there for a few more seconds, just staring at each other, I think both of us trying to convey that we were happy and comfortable with the arrangement. 

Finally Nik glanced down at her watch. “I’d better get going if I want to catch my train.” She looked up at me. “You’d better get yourself ready for work too.”

She apparently had already showered before she’d woken me, so she showed me where things were in the bathroom, and got me a towel and a cloth. She led me to the kitchen, gave me a quick tour, and told me to help myself to anything I could find. 

“We’ll do some grocery shopping later,” she told me. 

Finally, she went into her bedroom and reappeared a few seconds later holding up a couple of keys. 

“This one’s for the front door,” she said, holding up a brass colored key, “and this one’s for the apartment.” She held up a silver key. She handed them to me. 

“Take them. You’ll need them after work, because my shift runs until eight, so I won’t be back until probably eight thirty or so. And don’t worry, I’ll grab something to eat there at the cafeteria.”

I realized I didn’t even know what time it was. I asked her and she glanced at her watch and said, “Just after seven . . . so you better get moving.”

She was right. I headed to the shower. As I finished I heard her shout that she was just about ready to leave. I threw my robe on and hurried out. I caught her just about to open the door.

“Nik,” I called.

She turned. I saw a strange look on her face. She glanced at me, cut her eyes away, and then just subtly glanced back a couple of times. 

I looked down and realized that in my haste I hadn’t done a great job doing up my robe. I was showing a little more skin than I should have been.

I pulled my robe closed and then gave her a sheepish little grin. “Sorry about that.”

Nik stills seemed to be having trouble looking up at me. “Oops, you’d better behave yourself,” I thought with a little smile. 

I turned my attention back to Nik. “Before you go . . . and I promise this is the last time . . . but before you go I really wanted to tell you again how much I appreciate everything you’ve done for me.”

I found myself beaming at her. “You really are wonderful,” I added, and I thought I saw a little color on her cheeks. Just to lighten things I added, “ . . . I believe that . . . and I don’t care what other people are saying.”

That got a little smile out of her. “I’m starting to see you’re a bit of a goof,” she said as her smile grew.

“I’m not goofy . . . I’m amusing,” I told her and gave her my best, mischievous grin.

We just smiled at each other for a second or two, and then she reached for the door. “I’ve really got to go,” she said. “See you later. Have a good day.” 

She opened the door, gave me one last big grin, and then she was gone. 

I gave her a sweet little finger wave. I was grinning too. 

As the door closed, I was thinking to myself, “This is going to work out great.” I was looking forward to living with Nik. I just had a feeling we were going to be great friends.


	4. Chapter 4

It was kind of weird, wandering around someone else’s apartment when they weren’t home . . . especially someone you really didn’t know well. I guess this was kind of my place now too . . . but it really was Nik’s place.

I’d let myself in after work. That had felt a little strange.

In the short time I’d been there – the night before and this morning – I hadn’t really had any time to look around. But now that I was there alone, I found myself checking it out. 

The place wasn’t big, but it seemed very cozy. The furniture was a little older, but it was comfortable and the pieces seemed to complement each other quite nicely.

Nik had lots of art on the walls. Most of them were quite abstract – very colorful – but she had a cluster of three black and white photos of models – all wearing big hats that hid their faces – posed in silhouette, that I though were quite interesting. I guess they were kind of sexy, but they were very classy. I assumed Nik was probably into photography . . . or who knows, maybe she was the model in the photos.

I’d grabbed myself an apple from the fridge and ate it as I wandered over to a little bookshelf on the far wall. She had a few books there, mostly just general fiction . . . nothing that really jumped out at me. She had a bunch of framed pictures too. 

A number of them seemed to be family pictures. It looked like she had two older brothers, and if you can tell anything from pictures, I got the impression her family was close. 

I saw a graduation picture of her. She had her hair cut really short. She actually pulled it off quite well, I thought. I had to smile, though, because she looked so young and wide-eyed in that picture. 

Then I was shocked to see a picture of her in an army uniform. “Oh my God,” I thought. “She was actually in the military.” 

There were half a dozen pictures of her in uniform with a collection of other people. She looked a little different with shorter, light brown hair, but it was definitely her. There was one petite blonde woman in a number of the pictures, and from the way they always stood, kind of close to each other, I assumed they were friends. 

I shook my head. God, I really didn’t know anything about Nik, I realized. Actually, I decided, that wasn’t true. I knew the kind of person she was – from what she’d done for me these last few days – and that was probably all I really needed to know about her.

I finished the apple and glanced over towards the kitchen. “Well, those dishes aren’t washing themselves,” I thought, and headed over to tackle them. It wasn’t the most wonderful job, but honestly, I was only too happy to do it as a small repayment for all Nik had done for me. I found the dish soap and the dish rack and went to work. I noticed she had a docking station on the counter, so I popped my phone onto it, cranked up some tunes and listened to my music as I worked my way through the pile of dishes.

It took an hour at least, probably more, for me to finish. I figured out where the dishes and cutlery went and put them away, but for everything else, I just found an empty spot and put them where I thought they should go. I figured the next time Nik wanted to do some cooking, it was going to be like an Easter egg hunt for her, trying to find things.

I felt good, though, having done that for her. My small contribution, I figured. I knew it didn’t nearly offset all she’d done for me, of course.

I was thinking I really should do a little reading for my classes, but I felt a bit tired. My restless sleep the night before and a full day of work had taken a bit of a toll on me. Besides, I was still curious and wanted to explore some more.

I wandered over to the second bedroom. I figured that if this might be my space, I should take a look at it. I opened the door and looked around. It wasn’t huge, and like Nik had said, she had quite a bit of stuff stacked in it. 

I saw she did have a big desk over by the window. I hoped Nik would let me use it when I was studying or working on projects. 

On the wall beside the desk I saw she had more pictures tacked up. As I approached, I could see they were drawings. I leaned in closer and thought I recognized the petite blonde from the army pictures I’d seen earlier, smiling as she posed with the Eiffel Tower in the background. It was quite an amazing drawing. 

Beside it was another of the same woman, this time reclined on a beach chair, with sunglasses on and a beer in her hand, and wearing a very skimpy bikini. Again, I was amazed. It was a fantastic drawing. 

Maybe I appreciated it all the more because I could barely draw stick people and make them look slightly lifelike. 

When I was a kid, over the holidays, we’d sometimes play a game where you had to draw things based on the card you picked, and have other people on your team guess the answer. I was great at guessing, but any time I had to draw, it was an embarrassing catastrophe. Part of every game involved my siblings mocking my pictures after my turn at drawing. It always produced howls of laughter – from everyone but me. Us overachievers aren’t real thrilled about people laughing at us.

There were half a dozen other drawings of people and places and each was equally as impressive. One was somewhat more abstract. It took me a second – it seemed somehow familiar – but then I realized it was a drawing of the tattoos Nik had on her arm. I was wondering if Nik had done these. 

When I looked over at the desk, there was a coil bound sketch book on top that I knew was for artists. Yeah, working at Office Depot had really expanded my knowledge of things like that. 

It was laying open, and when I glanced at the page, I was shocked to see a drawing of me on it. I leaned closer and looked at it more carefully. Once again, it was amazing just how expressive the drawing was. The picture had me smiling, with my eyes twinkling mischievously. It seemed so perfect it was like looking into a mirror.

I was delighted that Nik had drawn such an amazing picture of me. It made me feel that much closer to her, knowing that she could catch so much of me in the drawing, and all from memory. I found myself staring at it and smiling for a few seconds. 

“See, I was right,” I thought. “She is the creative type . . . and very talented.” I gave myself a big pat on the back for being just so intuitive.

I wanted to see more of her work. I considered flipping through all the pages of the sketch book to see what else she’d drawn. The urge was almost overpowering. 

I was actually reaching for the book . . . and then I froze. It suddenly occurred to me that these were her private things and I really shouldn’t be looking through them without her permission. I got that tightness in my chest that I always get when I realize I’ve done something wrong or inappropriate. 

After all she’d done for me, this is how I repaid her? By being a nosy roommate who snoops through her things when she’s out? I felt thoroughly embarrassed.

I backed out of the room and closed the door. I really felt bad. I sometimes have an overly developed sense of what’s right and wrong, and I have been known to beat myself up for not always living up to my own lofty standards. 

To distract myself, I grabbed my computer and curled up in a big wing chair that was set over by the window. I assumed this was probably where Nik went when she wanted to read. I had some assignments on the computer I wanted to check on. If I focused on those, I hoped I could get over the guilt I was feeling. Luckily I’d downloaded them onto my hard drive, because I realized I had no internet here. “I’ll have to ask Nik for her Wi-Fi password,” I thought. There were so many things I needed to organize with Nik. 

After a bit I got up and grabbed a yogurt from the fridge. That and an apple wasn’t exactly a great supper, but I felt guilty about helping myself to her food too. That was another thing we were going to have to work out.

The stress and my lack of sleep the previous night seemed to catch up to me, because it appeared I drifted off at some point. The next sound I heard was Nik unlocking the door and coming into the apartment. 

I stood up and gave her a little wave. I’m sure my dopy smile and droopy eyelids gave away the fact I’d been sleeping.

She smiled brightly at me. “Glad to see you’re settling in,” she said as she hung her coat on a hook by the door. “So what did you get up to this evening?”

I just shrugged. “Not too much.”

“Did you get something to eat?”

I nodded. “Yep . . . and I’ll pay you back.”

She just waved off my comment, but while we were talking about food her eyes must have drifted towards the kitchen. She did this big double take, and then turned back to me. She stood there with her hands on her hips. “Oh, Liv, I was only kidding about the dishes. You really didn’t have to clean up that mess.”

I shrugged again and gave her a little smile. “It was no big deal. It’s the least I could do, after all you’ve done for me.”

She stood there for a few seconds, looking like she was trying to decide whether to scold me or thank me.

I put my hands on my hips and gave her a defiant look. “Don’t bother complaining any more,” I told her. “It’s done . . . and by the way . . . you’re welcome.”

She gave her head a little shake, but she was smiling now. “Thank you,” she said, and then added, “I really hate doing dishes . . . in case you hadn’t guessed.”

I smiled too. “Yeah, I kind of got that impression. Oh, and by the way, good luck finding things when you want to use them next time.”

She let out a little laugh. “Okay.” She gave me another big smile. “I think I’ll live with that if you’re willing to wash up my dirty dishes.”

Nik went over to the fridge and grabbed an apple. Unlike me – who just ate mine off the core – she grabbed a knife, quartered it, and cut out the core. Since the knives were in a block on the counter, I hadn’t been able to hide them on her.

When she’d cut her core into the garbage, she must have noticed what I’d put in there. As she picked up her first slice of apple, she asked me, casually, “So, a yogurt and an apple? Is that really all you had?”

I felt a little embarrassed. I looked away, and in a quiet, bashful voice said, “Yeah.”

She didn’t say anything. I just heard her crunching on her apple. When she finished the slice she was working on, she said, “Seriously, you should have more than that.”

I looked up at her, maybe feeling a little defiant again. I’d always had a thing about people telling me what to do. It was stupid, I know . . . especially when people are just trying to help me. Still, I heard myself saying, in almost a sulky tone, “Maybe I’m trying to watch my figure.”

Nik let out a little laugh. She fixed her eyes firmly on mine. “There’s nothing wrong with your figure, believe me.” As soon as the words were out of her mouth she almost looked a little embarrassed. I wasn’t sure why, but didn’t really pay it much attention.

She recovered quickly, changing up the subject. “Would you like me to make you a gourmet dinner? It’ll just take a few minutes.”

I looked at her, but from the crooked grin I saw spreading across her face, I had a sneaking suspicion that whatever she had in mind might not be quite so gourmet. “What’s that?” I was too curious not to ask.

She had a big grin. “How about a peanut butter and jam sandwich.” She paused and gave me a concerned look. “You’re not allergic to peanuts, are you?”

There was just so much we didn’t know about each other. I shook my head. “No, I love nuts,” and then murmured just loud enough for her to hear, “Must be why I like you.”

“Hey,” she responded immediately. She tried to give me a hurt expression, but it only lasted for maybe five seconds before she started giggling. “Just for that, no PB and J. You can make your own.”

We were both kind of giggling. I think it was becoming obvious that we were going to get along just fine.

She went over to the fridge, pulled out a loaf of bread and held it up. “Did you want a sandwich?”

“I thought I was on your naughty list?”

“Oh, you definitely are. Wait until the next time you’re in the shower. I’m definitely flushing the toilet.”

I had to laugh. I grinned at her. “Guess I’d better lock the door when I shower.”

“Ha,” she said with utter contempt. “Do you really think that will stop me?”

I was full out laughing now. God, it had been so long since I’d had a good laugh like that. Nik was every bit as silly as I was . . . and I definitely liked it.

“What did they train you as in the army, some kind of killer ninja?” As soon as I mentioned the army I froze. I think I stopped breathing as I stared at Nik. I was so afraid she’d be upset I’d been snooping around.

She did pause – just for the briefest instant – while her eyes flicked over to the pictures on the book shelf. When she turned them back to me I was so relieved to see she didn’t seem the least bit upset. “You saw my pictures from Iraq, did you?” 

She said it like it was no big deal. I started breathing again as the relief flooded through me.

It took me a second to process what she’d said. I’m sure my eyes widened and she must have seen the look of total awe on my face. “You were in Iraq?”

“Yeah.” She was smiling. I’d say she was obviously quite proud of herself. “I did two tours there. I was a medic . . . but I wasn’t up front where the fighting was happening. I was in the field hospital in the rear.”

I couldn’t possibly have been more impressed, and I’m sure it showed. I was giving Nik such a big, adoring look that she started getting embarrassed again.

To try and change the subject, she held up the loaf of bread. “You never did tell me if you wanted that sandwich.”

“Yes . . . please.” I was still staring at her in awe. 

She was smiling . . . so at some level I think she liked it . . . but I could still see a hint of red on her cheeks. 

She grabbed a plate from the cupboard and laid out a slice of bread. She quickly spread the peanut butter and jam onto it, and then cut it in half, diagonally, just like mom used to do. She presented the plate to me like it truly was some gourmet meal. 

I was still smiling at her. “Thanks,” I said, almost a little shyly. I knew I was being totally over the top with my adoring looks . . . but I really was impressed.

I took one bite of the sandwich. I threw my head back, my eyes fluttered and I let a loud, almost orgasmic, “Mmmm,” escape my lips. “Oh Nichole, this is the best gourmet meal I’ve ever had.”

I let out another throaty little moan and then took a huge, gluttonous bite like I couldn’t control myself. “Oh, this is so good,” I gushed, but my mouth was so full my words were almost unintelligible. 

I’d really kind of gotten carried away with myself. The bite was so big I found myself gagging. I sounded like one of our cats back home trying to cough up a hairball. After a few seconds when I feared I was going to need a Heimlich, I ended up having to spit the piece back out on the plate.

Meanwhile, Nik was laughing hysterically. When I spit the chunk of sandwich out she groaned at my grossness. “It serves you right for being such a pig,” she managed, before she started laughing again.

I sat there trying to get my breath back while tears streamed down Nik’s face. She had to turn away from me, and even then it took her a good long time before she’d settled back down and her breathing was back to normal. 

I probably didn’t help, because I kept making comments.

“The sandwich you made was clearly a health hazard . . . was that the same kind of death sandwich that you guys used on Bin Laden . . . so were you going to wait until I was a nice shade of blue before you gave me the Heimlich.”

Finally she turned around and yelled at me, “Stop it!” I could tell from her huge grin she wasn’t really mad.

I picked up the soggy, half eaten bit of sandwich. I furrowed my brows and muttered, “Eew!” 

Nik put her hands on her hips and gave me a stern look. “That’s perfectly fine, young lady. You finish eating it right now.” 

Wow, it was like Nik was channelling my mother from when I was ten or so, and contemplating seeing if the dog would eat my broccoli . . . because I sure didn’t intend to.

I smiled at her and mumbled, “I see you’re going to be a real mom from hell some day.” 

Nik just continued to give me that look. I couldn’t help laughing.

This time I nibbled down little bites until the whole sandwich – including that gross chunk – was gone.

When I was all finished and had licked my fingers clean I looked up at Nik and gave her a big, “Thanks . . . that was great.”

I really did appreciate it.

“You’re welcome,” she responded. I got the impression she was enjoying taking care of me. I didn’t mind.

She gathered up my plate and put it and the knife, and the other knife from her apple, into the sink.

“Making another mess already.” When she turned to me I just shook my head and sighed. “I see how it is, now that you have a slave to do your dishes.”

It was her turn to shake her head. “Wow, you just never stop complaining.” She paused, and then gave me a little smile like she’d just thought of something. “Oh, maybe you can pick up some duct tape at work. I think I might just need some.”

It took me a second to connect the dots . . . and then my mouth fell open in shock. “You’re going to use the duct tape on me?” I exclaimed, doing my best to show my outrage.

She gave me a wicked grin and her eyes were sparkling with mischief. “Just on your mouth,” she responded. “I’ve got to keep your hands free so you can wash dishes.”

I tried my best to look indignant, but that lasted all of two seconds before I was giggling. 

I looked over at her and found myself smiling. It was amazing how easy I found it to fall into this kind of playful banter with Nik, even though I really barely knew her. She just seemed to be one of those rare people that I really clicked with. 

I was getting the feeling she was feeling the same way.

“Did you want to relax and watch a bit of TV,” she asked, but then with a cheesy little grin added, “Or did you want to get right to those dishes.”

I just stuck my tongue out at her. So much for snappy comebacks.

We both flopped on the couch. Nik found a sit com I hadn’t seen, so we watched it. By the end of it, though, I found myself yawning.

Nik looked over at me. “You’re probably tired. I bet you hardly got any sleep last night.”

I reluctantly nodded. I was seriously powering down. I knew I had to get myself up and get ready for bed soon or I was just going to crash.

She asked if I had to work in the morning. I told her I only had a half day shift, so I didn’t have to be in until one. She said she was going over to nights, so she was around all day, but had to go in at eight in the evening.

I think we were both happy that we could sleep in.

I washed up and changed into my pajamas in the bathroom. By the time I came out, Nik had made up a comfortable bed for me on the couch.

“Are you sure you’ll be okay sleeping out here tonight?” she asked. 

I appreciated the concern I heard in her voice, but I just nodded and said I’d be fine.

“Like I said, what you went through last night was kind of like a trauma,” she told me. “Trust me, I’ve seen lots of trauma.” I knew she meant at work. 

When I thought about it, I wondered if she meant herself as well. I didn’t really know what she’d gone through over in Iraq.

“It’s not the kind of thing you want to try and tough out on your own. Just take the help that’s offered . . . that’s the best advice I can give. So if you need my help . . . just let me know. Really . . . don’t hesitate.”

I gave her a big, appreciative smile. She really was wonderful, and I really was grateful for all she’d done. And for all she was offering to do.

“I think I’ll be okay,” I told her again. I was feeling so tired, I thought I’d be out the second my head hit the pillow.

“Okay then,” she said, and turned towards her room.

“Hey,” I called out. When she turned back, I half stumbled over to her and gave her a big hug. “Thanks, again,” I whispered in her ear as I held her tightly.

When I finally let her go I turned and headed back to the couch. I felt totally drained. I even struggled getting the covers pulled over me. I must have been totally pathetic looking, because after a couple of seconds Nik came over and tucked me in. 

“Have a good sleep,” she whispered, and gave me a light little kiss on the cheek. 

I think I mumbled, “You too,” but maybe that was just in my head. And then I was out.

\-----------------------------------------------------------------------------------------

My eyes shot open. The room was very dark and quiet. I found myself looking around, uncertain of where I was. My heart was pounding and I was breathing in shallow little breaths. 

I didn’t know what had woken me. I didn’t know if I’d heard something or felt something or what. All I knew was that I was tense and my senses were on high alert. Maybe it was a dream I had . . . I didn’t really remember. 

I fumbled on the coffee table for my glasses. It was bad enough trying to detect some threat without everything in the room being a fuzzy blur. I looked around again but didn’t see anything.

My brain was telling me it was nothing and I should just go back to sleep. I tried closing my eyes, but that didn’t seem to last long. It just increased my anxiety.  
I lay there for probably half an hour, stressing out and trying to deal with it. 

Finally I decided that was enough of being stubborn. I rose and quietly made my way into Nik’s room. I stood there by her bed for a couple of minutes, knowing I needed to wake her, but reluctant to do it. 

Her words were coming back to me . . . take the help that’s offered if you want to get past this. I knew in my heart she was right. 

I still found it hard, but finally I whispered, softly, “Nik.” Her even breathing continued, undisturbed. “Nik,” I said a little louder, and then I repeated her name again, a little louder still. 

I saw her shift under the covers and her breathing changed. In the dim light of her room I saw her eyes half open. 

“Liv,” she said. She sounded like she was still asleep, but after a second she reached over and flung the covers back on my side of the bed. She patted the sheet beside her with her hand. “Crawl in.”

I hesitated for just a second, and then did as she’d said. I slipped into the bed and pulled the covers over myself. Nik slid up behind me, slipped her arms around me and gave me a big hug. “Go to sleep,” she whispered, and gave me a little kiss on the neck.

I instantly felt so much better. Having Nik there made me feel safe. I took my glasses off and laid them on the night table, snuggled myself against Nik and relaxed. 

I think she was already back to sleep, but that didn’t matter to me. Just having her there beside me eased all my anxieties.

I closed my eyes and soon drifted off.


	5. Chapter 5

I had a much better night’s sleep. I might have woken a couple of times, but the reassuring warmth of Nik pressed against me settled me back down quickly. 

When I finally woke I could see light filtering into the room around the edge of the curtains. I realized immediately that I couldn’t feel Nik against me anymore. I rolled over and found her propped up in the bed looking at her tablet. 

She must have felt me moving around because she looked over and gave me a smile. “Morning,” she said. “Looks like you got a good sleep.” 

I squinted at the clock and could see it was just after eight. That was a pretty good sleep.

I glanced back at Nik. I was feeling a little bit sheepish. “Is it weird for you, waking up in the morning and finding a strange women in your bed?” 

She gave me a funny little smile and looked away for a second. When she looked back at me she was grinning. “I don’t mind . . . and besides, I don’t find you that strange.”

Yeah, she’d gotten me again. I had no comeback, so I just made a face and stuck my tongue out at her.

She smiled, and soon I was smiling too. We just shared that for a few seconds, until Nik turned away, looking almost a little embarrassed again – I really wasn’t sure what about. 

I sat up in bed, grabbed my glasses, and scooted over right beside her. “What you looking at?” I asked. I wanted to get to know her better, so I was quite interested.

“Um, just reading the news,” she told me.

I pressed myself against her and let my head rest on her shoulder as I glanced at her tablet. I felt Nik tense. It dawned on me that maybe I was getting carried away and invading her personal space. I guess that made me tense too. But then Nik seemed to relax. She slipped an arm around my shoulder and pulled me back against her. I felt very comfortable like that.

I found she actually was reading the news. “I didn’t think anybody read the news these days.”

She looked down at me. “I do. I like to know what’s going on in the world.”

“Don’t you just get it off Facebook like everybody else?”

She snorted. I’d say it was a sound of contempt. “Facebook has so much garbage on it . . . only an idiot would get news from there.”

She suddenly glanced down at me. I could see maybe a hint of concern in her eyes. Obviously after she’d made her comment, it occurred to her she might have offended me.

I just smiled up at her, though, feeling even more certain that we would get along just fine. 

“Don’t worry,” I told her. “I only use Facebook for sharing pictures with my family. I’m the one who keeps telling them that half the stuff they see on there is total garbage.”

I’m sure that frustrated little smile that I always get had crept onto my face. “That doesn’t stop my mother from sharing stuff that’s total BS all the time though.” I shook my head. “ I just can’t make her understand that if it sounds too crazy to be true, it probably is.” After a second I added, “And people complain about Millennials and the internet all the time. My mother and my aunts . . . they’re totally ridiculous.”

Nik chuckled softly. She gave me a little squeeze and said, “Believe me, I know what you mean.”

I looked up at her again. “I really thought I was the only one left in the world who paid attention to the real news.” I shook my head again. “You wouldn’t believe in class, when a professor askes about some current event, half the people – at least – typically have no clue what they’re talking about. 

“Back when I was in high school, when kids didn’t know stuff, I just thought it was a small town thing. I assumed college would be so much better. Maybe it’s a little better . . . but not that much.”

“It really is sad,” Nik agreed. We just sat there quietly for a second or two.

I felt Nik looking down at me, so I turned to meet her gaze. 

“You know, I don’t even know what you’re taking in college.”

Yeah, I know I kept thinking it, but there really was a lot we didn’t know about each other.

“I’m just taking general arts right now,” I told her. “But I want to get into journalism next year.”

“Cool,” she said and smiled at me. “Does that mean I’m going to be seeing you on Fox News in a few years?”

I rolled my eyes and gave her a playful little poke in the side. “No! I can guarantee you that you’ll never see me on Fox News. They shouldn’t even be allowed to call that news.”

Yeah, there were lots of things I had strong opinions about. Nik was just scratching the surface.

I could see she’d been teasing me, though, because now she was kind of laughing at me. I wondered if my reaction was that predictable. 

“So what is it you want to get into? TV? Print? Or . . . .”

I grinned. “War correspondent?” I added.

Surprisingly, that got a very serious look from Nik. “I wouldn’t recommend that,” was all she said.

She was silent for a minute and it looked like her mind had wandered off somewhere. Yeah, there was a lot I didn’t know about her.

As I thought about it, I found a little smile spreading across my face. I realized I was excited by the prospect of getting to know her better. 

I slipped my arm around her and gave her a little squeeze. She looked down at me and gave me a smile.

“Sorry,” I told her earnestly. “Did I go somewhere that’s not good for you.” 

She glanced away and I saw a melancholy smile touch her face. After a second she looked back at me and said, “It’s fine. The war for me wasn’t really that bad. But seeing all the tragedy . . . the wounded over there . . . and the people here still dealing with it . . . . It’s just really not my favorite topic.”

Her comment sounded so raw and heartfelt that I felt a little bad. I put my other arm around her and gave her a big hug. “I’m sorry,” I told her softly. “That’s something I’ll try not to joke about.”

“It’s not your fault,” she replied, and squeezed me right back. She kissed me lightly on the forehead.

We sat there, quietly, for a bit, just holding each other. I thought maybe her mind had wandered off again, so I didn’t want to disturb her. 

I wondered if maybe she needed someone to talk things through with. I made a promise to myself to be there for her if she ever did – like she’d been there for me.

Nik gave me another squeeze, looked down at me again. “Why don’t I make us pancakes for breakfast?”

I was on board with that. I loved pancakes. “Great,” I all but shouted.

I jumped out of bed. I grabbed Nik’s hand and pulled her up. “Let’s go,” I gushed excitedly. 

I literally dragged her by the hand all the way to the kitchen. She must have enjoyed my enthusiasm because she was laughing all the way.

I leaned up against the cupboards, looked at her and shouted, “Come on, get cooking! I’m hungry!”

She just grinned at me. She was being very tolerant of my childish – I mean, amusing – behaviour. 

“Just calm yourself down,” she told me sternly, “or you’re going to be eating dry cereal while you’re watching me eat pancakes.” That was her ‘mom’ voice again. For some reason I found it very amusing when she used it on me.

I grinned back at her as she started opening cupboards, obviously looking for something. After her third unsuccessful try she looked up at me. “Where did you hide the mixing bowls?” she asked, sounding exasperated. I think she might have been playing it up a bit.

I stepped away from the cupboard I was leaning against, opened the door and with a big flourish pointed at the bowls like I was a game show hostess showing off the grand prize.

“Why would you put them there?” she muttered as she dug out a large bowl.

Next she went through three drawers before she found a big mixing spoon. When she finally did she turned to me and gave me a ‘what did you do to my kitchen’ look. 

I just smiled. “If you want to know where things are, all you have to do is ask?”

“Really?” Her look said she didn’t believe me. “Where’s my cheese grater?”

I scrunched up my face and gave her a sideways look. “You’re going to put cheese in pancakes?”

“No. I just want to see if you actually know where things are.”

Aha, a challenge. I loved a challenge. I pointed to the cupboard she was standing in front of. She opened it and there was the cheese grater, front and center. “You probably saw it when I was looking for the bowls,” she muttered. 

I gave her my smug little smile. “I win, you lose,” I thought to myself.

It seemed Nik had no plans to give up so easily. “How about the garlic press?

I pointed to the second drawer, and when she opened it, there it was.

“My glass measuring cups?”

I stepped aside and opened the cupboard that had the bowls in it. On the second shelf were an assortment of measuring cups. “Plastic measuring cups are in that drawer,” I added, pointing to one beside where she was standing. She didn’t even bother opening it to prove me wrong.

My smug little smile remained firmly in place. “I can do this all day.” Yeah, I wasn’t above taunting people.

Nik was looking at me like maybe I was going to only get dry cereal after all. Then I saw a little smile. “Can you now? Okay, how about my ice cream scoop?”

I paused, trying to remember. There had been so many things I’d washed and put away. I didn’t specifically remember an ice cream scoop. “Um, that drawer there,” I said with less than absolute confidence. I thought I was putting similar things in that particular drawer. 

She opened the drawer, looked through it, and then looked up at me. This time she was wearing the smug smile. “Don’t see any ice cream scoop.”

I scrambled. “No, not that drawer . . . the one below it.”

Nik opened that drawer, gave it a thorough inspection, but again shook her head. “Nope, not here.”

There weren’t that many drawers, so there weren’t that many places I would have put it. I glanced around and pointed at another drawer – my last hope. “It must be there, then.” I wasn’t sounding overly confident.

Nik was grinning. She opened the drawer, gave it a quick look and then looked up at me. Her smug smile had grown. Even her eyes were twinkling as she happily told me, “No ice cream scoop.”

I furrowed my brow and looked at her suspiciously. “Do you even own an ice cream scoop?”

Now that grin was filling her face. She shrugged and said, “I’m pretty sure I do, but now we’ll never know because you put it somewhere and we can’t find it.”

I pointed at her and scowled. “You’re lying! I know it. You don’t even have an ice cream scoop. Admit it.”

She was laughing now, definitely amused. “Nope. Pretty sure I have one . . . somewhere. Anyway, you can’t prove I’m lying.”

I jumped at her and tried to give her a playful little shot on the shoulder. She danced away from me, though, taking her turn to do a little taunting. “Too slow,” she almost sang as she dodged this way and then the other. 

I finally caught up to her by the couch – or maybe she let me catch her. I tackled her and we both fell down onto cushions with me on top of her.

“Admit you’re lying,” I shouted as I tried to tickle her. 

She grabbed my hands and easily overpowered me. In a second she was on top of me, holding me down. It was like wresting with my older brother all over again. 

Nik was laughing so hard I thought she was going to start crying, like she had the previous night. 

I gritted my teeth and struggled. “Now I have you right where I wanted you,” I said, and then I was laughing too.

It took both of us a good couple of minutes to calm down. Nik stayed on top of me the whole time. She told me she didn’t dare let me go. “I don’t know what you might do.” With a big grin she added, “If this were at the hospital, I’d be ordering up a straight jacket right away.”

I laughed, in spite of myself.

Nik continued to stare down at me. Out of the blue she said, “You’re really beautiful when you’re angry, you know.”

I let my eyes go big. “Oh, this isn’t angry. You haven’t seen angry. You couldn’t handle me when I’m angry.” I struggled a little more, but then I was back to laughing.

I smiled up at Nik. I guess all the laughing or the ‘exertion’ of holding me down was getting to her, because her face was quite red.

We sat there for another couple of seconds. Nik finally stood up and pulled me up. The narrow space between the couch and the coffee table meant that when I was standing, Nik and I were pretty much pressed against each other. 

I stared up at her as she smiled at me. I think she was giving me an adoring look. I have to admit, I can be quite adorable . . . and entertaining. 

I freed one of my hands and gave her a gentle poke in the ribs. “Are you ready for round two?” I asked, defiantly.

She grinned. See, I was very entertaining.

“Wouldn’t you rather I made those pancakes?” she asked.

She had me there. I nodded enthusiastically.

She led me back to the kitchen, with her arm around me. She guided me to my spot by the cupboard, out of the way, and said, “Now you stay here and try to keep out of trouble. If I need anything, I promise, I’ll ask.”

“Sounds good,” I told her. 

She started digging ingredients out of the cupboard and the fridge while we chatted. She’d just started mixing them when she looked up at me and said, “I could use some music. I always like music when I’m in the kitchen.”

I gave her a sad little look. “What, are you trying to drown me out?”

She glanced at me. “I’d never want to do that.” She said the words with such genuine feeling that I was kind of touched. 

Hey, we all want to be heard, right? It made me feel very special . . . I think especially because Nik had said it. I was really feeling close to her . . . which was amazing after knowing her for such a short time.

She walked over to her docking station. My phone was still on it. She glanced up at me, raised an eyebrow, and asked, “Do you mind?”

I just shrugged. Actually, I felt a little nervous as she turned on my music. You could say I have an eclectic mix of songs on my playlist. I had no idea what Nik was into, or if she’d be totally put off by my selections. 

The first song that started was an older one, by Bonnie Raitt . . . Something to Talk About. It had kind of a slower, different sound to it, but I’d always really liked it.

I was tense until I saw Nik smile. She glanced over at me and said, “Yeah, I like this.” With that she danced her way back over to the counter and started back into mixing her batter, only pausing to sing along to the chorus. She kept glancing over at me and smiling as the song played, so I assumed she like it.

Soon she had blueberry pancakes on the griddle. My mouth was watering. 

I’ve got to say, I was quite impressed with the way Nik whipped up those pancakes. I’ll admit, I’m not too handy in the kitchen. My two older sisters were wonderful cooks, but I was a complete disaster. My kitchen skills topped out at grilled cheese, and there really wasn’t even a guarantee with that.

Nik had me get some strawberries from the fridge. I washed them and sliced them up into a bowl – my big contribution to the meal – and I even managed to do that without cutting off a finger. 

Soon we were sitting down to a big plate of golden brown pancakes. They looked amazing, and I told her so. Nik looked quite pleased with herself.

I was just going to grab one of the pancakes when Nik interrupted me. She held out her hand. “Just before we eat, I’d like to give thanks.”

I’m sure I gave her that deer in the headlights look. I really hadn’t expected that.

I let her take my hand and lowered my head. 

“Thanks, for our families, for our health, and for this food. And thanks for new friends that fill our hearts with happiness and help make the journey through life so much more enjoyable.” 

I’d glanced up when she’d mentioned ‘friends’ and saw that she was looking at me. Her face and her eyes seemed to be shining with genuine happiness. I found myself returning that look.

There was no ‘Amen’ or anything at the end. She just let my hand go and went for the pancakes. I found myself still sitting there, staring at her.

I’m sure the fact that I wasn’t lunging for the pancakes caught her attention. After a few second Nik looked up at me. When I just continued staring she said, “What?” It was almost like my gaze made her a little uncomfortable.

“Nothing,” I said. I wasn’t sure how to put it. I really wasn’t one to hold my tongue, though, so finally I said, “I didn’t realize you were . . . religious.” I tried to say it in a tone that was as neutral as possible.

Nik looked at me. She didn’t say anything for a number of seconds. I was wondering if we were about to have our first disagreement. I cringed. I knew religion could be a real serious area of contention. If we were going to disagree on something, why couldn’t it be about how disgusting broccoli was!

I was dreading it, but finally Nik spoke. She was very matter of fact. I got the impression that this was something she’d thought about a bit, and I was pretty sure I wasn’t the first person she’d explained it to.

“I’m not religious. I don’t go to church or pray or read the bible of stuff like that. I just like to take a few minutes every day to remind myself about the things in my life I’m thankful for. I think that’s always a good idea. It helps keep me grounded, and it helps me remember what’s really important in my life.”

I’m very much an atheist. This fact often draws deep sighs from my mother, and I’ve heard at least one of my aunts commenting on how ‘that girl’s definitely going to hell.’ I long ago decided I was willing to take my chances, though. 

Given that, I had to admit that Nik’s comments made more sense to me than any I’d ever heard from others on why they held the beliefs they did. 

I found myself smiling at her. “I’ve never heard anyone express it like that. I like it.”

She shrugged. “That’s just what feels right for me.” She paused, and then asked, “That isn’t a problem for you, is it?”

I shook my head. “Definitely not. Actually, I think it makes more sense than most of what I’ve heard from organized religions.” 

I was being honest. I didn’t see any issues with recognizing all those things in our lives we were thankful for. Especially since she wasn’t giving credit for them to some mysterious, all-powerful, all-seeing deity.

I think we were both relieved.

A crooked little grin split her face. She leaned forward and said, “Actually, I’m thinking of starting my own little cult. Do you want to join?”

I grinned back. “Absolutely. Where do I sign up? And do I get a free t-shirt when I join?”

We had a little laugh, and then turned back to the serious business of eating pancakes. I smothered one in syrup and strawberries and dug in. They were great, and I made sure I told Nik.

She just smiled. “Of course they are. I’m a master in the kitchen.”

“More like a diva,” I muttered.

“Oh,” she cried in outrage. She reached for my plate, saying, “If that’s what you think, no more pancakes for you,” but I chased her off with my fork, poking her a few times in the process.

We were laughing again. “I’m kidding,” I told her. “You are definitely a master in the kitchen . . . and these are definitely amazing.” 

“That’s more like it.” She was the one muttering this time.

“Now can I have one more . . . pretty please.” I gave her my most adorable smile and batted my eyes at her. 

She gave me a tight little smile, but I think her eyes were saying that she thought I truly was adorable. “Okay . . . as long as you behave yourself.”

I poked a pancake and as I dropped it on my plate said, “No promises,” which drew an stern look of warning from Nik. I just gave her my go-to response and stuck my tongue out at her. Not at all mature, I know, but it got a little grin from her.

In no time we’d finished off the stack of pancakes. Nik and I split the last one, although I probably didn’t need it. I guess it had just been so long since I’d had a good, home-cooked meal, that I really didn’t want to stop. 

I was also really enjoying having this time with Nik. Let’s face it, we’d only known each other for a couple of days, really, but already I felt like she was my new best friend. I couldn’t remember the last time I’d laughed this much. I found it was just so easy to be myself – my silly, goofy self – around her. I didn’t feel that way often – just so at ease and comfortable – even with friends I had back home that I’d know since I was a kid.

I also had to admit, I was definitely in awe of her. She was such a wonderful person (just look at all she’d done for me, and I was a complete stranger to her just a few days ago), she had served her country, she was doing a very meaningful job, and crushing it, I was sure, she could cook, she could draw . . . she could make me laugh. And of course she made me feel safe and secure. She was almost like a superhero. 

Hey, if I wanted to worship somebody, I decided she’d be a good candidate. Maybe I was ready to sign up for her cult after all!

When we were done I quickly hopped up and cleared away the plates and stuff, and then started running some water in the sink to do the dishes.

“You don’t have to do those,” she told me.

I just gave her a little smile. “You made me breakfast, so it’s the least I can do.”

I started washing and she came over and started drying. I told her she didn’t have to, but I was finding she didn’t listen any better than I did.

When she went to put stuff away, I made a point of telling her where thing should go. She just laughed. “You’ve totally reorganized my cupboards.”

“That’s right. I bet you’re already noticing how much more sense it make now.”

I smiled as I got the big eye roll.

As she was dropping the mixing spoon into a drawer I commented, “While you’re in there, maybe take a look for an ice cream scoop. _Supposedly_ . . . it’s around her somewhere.”

She let out a little laugh and glanced up at me. Her eyes had a mischievous twinkle in them. 

I gave her a little ‘I know you lied to me’ scowl and returned to my dish washing.

With the two of us working at it, we were done in no time.

“See, that wasn’t so bad,” I told her.

She nodded. “It is a little more fun when I get to do it with you,” she admitted.

I arched my eyebrows and gave her a big silly grin. “So you like doing it with me, do you?” I said, and laughed.

I couldn’t believe how red Nik got. It was a goofy joke –maybe slightly inappropriate – but I was surprised it set her off so much. That just made me laugh even more.

I turned, wiped down the table and the counter, and then we were finished.

I plopped down onto the couch and sat back, feeling stuffed and very contented.

I glanced over at Nik, who seemed to be puttering around, straightening things up in the kitchen.

“Probably reorganizing things I’d organized,” I thought. 

“When you’re done, why don’t you come sit down,” I called over to her. “There’s probably some things we should talk about.”

She seemed almost a little sheepish when she came over. It was so weird, because Nik was nothing if not totally confident. I just let it pass. You never know what things people might have on their minds.

She sat down at the far end of the couch. Her eyes were kind of wandering around the room. I started wondering again what she was thinking about. After all she’d done for me, if there was something that was bothering her, I really wanted to be there to help. I thought I’d get her talking, and then maybe she’d let me in on whatever it was.

“Um, we really should talk about the apartment . . . well . . . you know . . . me staying here and everything.” 

She half turned in her seat and looked at me. It seemed I had her attention again.

I tucked my feet underneath me and took a deep breath. I was feeling so nervous. I could feel my heart beating rapidly and I had that tightness in my chest. I swallowed and started talking. 

“I know you said I could stay here and everything, but just so you know, I’m not going to hold you to that.” 

She looked like she was going to interrupt me, so I held up my hands to stop her, and then continued. 

“I appreciate so much everything you’ve done for me . . . I think I might have mentioned that . . . .”

She grinned and nodded. “Once or twice, I think,” she said, interrupting me.

I gave her my best appreciative smile. “. . . but I don’t want you to feel you’ve got any obligation to me. If anything, I owe you . . . so much.” I paused and just stared at her, trying to convey just how deeply I meant those words. 

I took another deep breath and continued. “So you need to decide, I guess, what it is you want. If you decide a roommate just isn’t your thing, I totally understand . . . .”

Now it was Nik’s turn to hold up her hand. I paused, reluctantly, but then realized that anything else we needed to decide really did depend on what she wanted. So I nodded and let her speak.

“Liv, I meant what I said,” were her first words. I think my heart kind of soared and I couldn’t keep the happiness off my face. Nik clearly noticed my response, because her face shone with an equally brilliant smile.

“I really do want you to stay . . . if you want to.” I guess it was kind of a question, but I didn’t think I needed to respond for her to know what my answer was.

“You aren’t afraid I’ll drive you crazy?” I joked. I was feeling amazing. My chest was swelling with joy so much I thought it might explode. Nik would be scraping my guts off the walls for a week.

Her brow furrowed and a far-away look came over her eyes, like she was deep in thought. “You have a good point,” she said slowly. Her eyes fell to me as she added, “You can be kind of bratty . . . and you have no idea where things belong in the kitchen . . . .”

I was giggling at this point, but she wasn’t done. “. . . and it seems you’ve lost my ice cream scoop . . . .”

At this I jumped up in mock outrage. “You don’t have an ice cream scoop, you big liar,” I shouted, and then launched myself at her. 

I’m pretty feisty if not overly strong, and Nik was laughing so hard she was having trouble fending me off. We rolled off the couch onto the floor – one big ball of giggles – where she finally pinned me. I didn’t really struggle. I just lay there, looking up at her, laughing. She was no better.

After a minute Nik got up and pulled me back up. We sat back down on the couch, only this time she sat much closer to me. 

“Okay,” she finally said, “Then it’s official. You’re staying . . . right?”

I smiled and nodded.

“So I guess we should decide how this is going to work.” She paused, trying to get her thoughts in order I figured. “So you were staying with you cousin . . . how much was she charging you?”

Right into the money stuff. That, of course, made me nervous. “Um, I was paying five hundred a month,” I told her, hoping desperately that would be enough.

She looked at me for a second or two, while my heart pounded and my breath stopped. Finally she spoke. “How about I charge you three hundred a month?”

I couldn’t believe my ears. I looked at her. Once again – for, like, the millionth time – I thought she was being so generous to me. But then I felt a little tinge of guilt.

“No,” I said, quite firmly. “That’s not enough.” That stubborn, self-reliant streak of mine was kicking in. “I’m not asking for charity . . . and I don’t need it. I can pay my own way.” I was getting a little fired up. What didn’t help my frame of mind was the fact that the more indignant I got, the bigger Nik’s grin seemed to grow.

I stood up, hands on my hips and leaned over her. I couldn’t quite get mad at her, but I felt quite strongly that I needed to be fair to her. I didn’t want her to start resenting me later on because she’d been overly generous and I’d taken advantage of it.

I calmed myself a little before I spoke. “Really, Nik, that’s incredibly generous – again – but I honestly would feel better if I were paying my fair share.”

When she spoke, she was calm and reasonable. “Look, I’m offering you that tiny little bedroom, and to be honest, I still expect to keep some of my crap in there. Plus . . . ,“ now I saw a little grin “ . . . I’ll be getting you to wash dishes, and who know what else. Maybe even vacuum or dust or . . . clean the toilet, or . . . or reorganize the kitchen.” 

“Wow, you make it sound so great.” I said it with a straight, unsmiling face. “It almost sounds like I’m Cinderella, cleaning up after everybody.” Yeah, I had loved those Disney movies when I was young.

Nik raised an eyebrow. “What does that make me . . . the wicked step-mother?”

“If the shoe fits,” I mumbled – loud enough that she could hear, of course.

She let out a little laugh. “Wait a minute . . . I thought Cinderella could cook,” she shot back.

Okay, she had me there. Maybe she’d watched the movie as a kid too. 

It was kind of scary that I hadn’t even told her just how inept I was in the kitchen, yet she already had figured it out. Could she tell just from the awkward way I’d cut up those strawberries?

I guess that was enough of my sidetracking our discussion. Nik got us back on topic.

“You can pay a share of the cable and internet . . . and we’ll split the food costs. Let’s give it a little bit and then we can talk and decide if we need to adjust anything.”

I maybe still didn’t look totally convinced. She continued. “You have to remember, I’ve been paying my own way in here, so having a roommate definitely helps me out.”

Her eyes softened and she gave me this almost shy little smile. “Besides, I really like having you around. You make me laugh . . . you make me feel good . . . and I really enjoy your company.”

Her words were so heartfelt that they really touched me. I reached out and gave her hand a squeeze. I didn’t think I needed to say that I felt the same way.

After a few seconds she finally spoke again. “What do you say? Are we roommates?”

I was struggling coming up with any arguments. It probably didn’t help my cause that I definitely wanted to be roommates with her. So finally I relented.

I smiled at her and said, “Okay . . . roommates it is.”

She gave me this huge smile, and then the next thing I knew she was giving me a huge hug. Well, I guess if she hadn’t, I probably would have been hugging her.

Nik seemed quite excited. Who was I kidding . . . I was excited too. We both eagerly agreed that this was going to be great. “And not just compared to my last roommates,” I quipped, and we both laughed.

Nik asked if I’d had a look at the bedroom yet, and I sheepishly admitted that I had “poked my head in.” That didn’t really seem to bother her.

We went over to the room and stood in the doorway looking around. “I can probably move some of these boxes into my room,” Nik told me.

I gave her an evil little look. “If you want I can reorganize all this stuff for you.” It seemed a generous offer.

Her eyes grew wide and she had a look of utter horror. “Oh, god, no. Please don’t. I’d never be able to find anything again.” With a twisted little grin she added, “And who knows what might go missing this time.”

I gave her a scowl and a little poke in the ribs, but she just laughed.

I walked over by the desk and turned my eyes to the drawings on the wall. As I looked at them again, I felt even more amazed by how good they were.

I glanced up at Nik. “Did you draw these?” I asked.

She paused, just for a second, while her eyes flicked over the drawings. Then she nodded.

“I’m sorry if I’m being too much of a snoop, but I saw these last night. They’re amazing.” I looked from the drawings back to Nik. “You’re a really a fantastic artist.”

Nik seemed pleased with my comments, especially when I laughed and added, “Is there anything you’re not amazing at?”

I bent over and looked at them again. “This woman . . . is she the same one who’s in your army pictures.”

I continued looking at the drawings . . . until I realized Nik hadn’t answered me. 

I turned and saw here standing there, very still, her eyes far, far away. She must have sensed me looking at her, because just for a second her eyes flickered to me, and then back off into space.

After a moment she spoke. Her voice was laced with heartbreaking sorrow as she said, “Sonja . . . that’s Sonja. She was a . . . a friend . . . a very special friend . . . .” She took a deep, ragged breath and I was afraid she was going to burst into tears. She didn’t, though. She took a couple more deep breaths and then seemed to calm herself. It was like all the joy had been sucked out of her, though.

I felt so bad for her. Her pain seemed so raw, I didn’t really want to dig into it. I just stood there, staring at her.

She finally looked at me and gave me a half-hearted smile – almost like she was trying to reassure me. “It’s okay. It’s been, like, four years . . . .”

“If you ever want to talk about it . . . I mean, that . . . or anything . . . you know you can, Nik.” 

That weak smile remained on her face, but her eyes seemed to brighten a bit, almost acknowledging my offer.

“After all you’ve done for me . . . really, I’d be only too happy to listen. Weren’t you the one who said how therapeutic listening was for your people at the VA.”

The warmth in her eyes spread to her lips. “Thanks,” she said in a quiet voice. “I just might take you up on that sometime.”

I gave her a stern look. It was time for me to show off my ‘mom’ side. In a firm voice I said, “You make sure you do that . . . when you’re ready.” My voice softened as I added, “You know it always helps to talk about these things.” Even if I had no clue what ‘this thing’ was.

We stood there silently for a moment. Nik was lost in thoughts and I didn’t really want to disturb her.

Finally I glanced down at my watch. “Oh god, I’d better start getting ready. I’ve got to work in an hour.”

I headed for the door, but as I passed Nik I paused and placed a hand on her shoulder. I looked up at her and waited for her eyes to meet mine. “I’m sorry, roomie,” I said. That brought a little smile to her face. “I’m still figuring out all these land mines I’m supposed to avoid.”

“Don’t worry,” she responded. She was sounding a little more like her normal self – not so pained and heartbroken. She regarded me for a moment, and then asked, “Are there any land mines I need to avoid with you?”

I laughed and shook my head. I realized that even though Nik wasn’t that much older than me, she had lived so much more than I had. Then a thought popped into my head. “I moved five hours from home to come to school, so I wouldn’t have to listen to my mother ask me about when I was going to settle down and get married and have babies. So please, don’t ever go there with me.”

She laughed and rolled her eyes. “Oh, I’ve been there,” she responded. She gave me a little smile. “I think my mom’s finally given up on me.”

I just laughed. “Hey, you’re still young. You never know . . . your Prince Charming might be just around the next corner.”

Nik gave me a bit of an odd look and opened her mouth like she was going to say something . . . but then she just shook her head. She grinned at me and said, “You’d better get going or you’re going to be late for work.”

I rushed off, showered and changed. I was still stuffed full of pancakes, so I didn’t need anything else to eat. I did ask Nik about food, though, and she agreed we could go shopping after I was done work. I said I’d meet her at the grocery store just after five.


	6. Chapter 6

Things were slow at work, but there was still stuff that had arrived on the truck on Friday that the slack asses hadn’t bothered to put away yet. I dug into it and had the bulk of it done by closing time – and that made the time go quickly. Our manager gave me an appreciative smile, because I think he knew how hard I worked when I was there. He kept bugging me to take more hours, but I didn’t want to slack off on my school work.

I caught up with Nik at the grocery store. She seemed to have put whatever melancholy the memory of her friend, Sonja, had brought up behind her and was back to her normal, wonderful self.

We wheeled around the store, loading up on things. I don’t think I’ve ever had so much fun grocery shopping. We were maybe a bit loud and a bit of a hazard to the other shoppers, but we were enjoying ourselves. Our behaviour got us a few stares, but that wasn’t the type of thing that ever bothered me. 

I was pleased to see Nik didn’t believe in buying a lot of unhealthy junk food. She was probably a lot better than me, even, because she actually had plans to turn the things we bought into real meals.

When we got to the checkout this perky blonde cashier gave a little wave and called, “I’m open over here, Nikki.” 

I saw Nik grimace, but she wheeled the cart over to that checkout anyway. The cashier seemed all smiley when Nik started unloading the groceries onto the conveyor, but her face seemed to change when she saw me helping. She gave me a look like I was something less than appealing that she’d just found on the bottom of her shoe. “Who’s your friend,” she asked Nik in an icy tone.

Nik glanced at me and looked almost giddy as she told the girl I was her new roommate. That got me another one of those frosty glares. 

I had no idea what was going on, but I decided this woman was a total bitch . . . and possibly some kind of deranged psycho. She quietly rang up our purchases, being none too gentle with things, and then in the same cool tone told Nik the total.

“I’m paying,” I said immediately as I dug my wallet out of my purse. Both women looked at me, but I just fixed my eyes on Nik. “I’m paying,” I repeated, firmly.

She took a few seconds, but then said, “Okay.”

I turned to the ice bitch and paid. As we left she called to us, “Have a nice day,” but from her tone I suspected she really didn’t mean it.

As soon as we were out of the store I turned to Nik and asked, “What was her problem?”

Nik just gave a shrug. “Every time I come in she acts like she’s my new best friend. I don’t know what’s up with it, but I kind of enjoyed that tonight.”

“Nice, so I got thrown under the bus for your amusement.” Okay, I was grinning when I said it, and I really wasn’t at all upset. I just liked bugging Nik.

I think Nik could tell. “Isn’t that what roommates are for?” she responded.

\--------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------

When we opened the door to her apartment – or, I guess, our apartment – I took one big sniff and my mouth began to water. I didn’t know what it was, but Nik had something in the oven and it smelled wonderful.

“It’s just a little chicken casserole I whipped up,” she told me modestly as we unpacked the groceries and put them away. “I thought we could make a salad and we’d be set.”

She put me to work cutting up some vegetables, but after a minute she came over and took the knife away from me. “I’m sorry, dear . . . ,” she started, and then just froze. There was a horrified look on her face and I saw he cheeks redden.

I started laughing. “What is it, sweetie, do I make you nervous when I’m chopping things?” Nik only got redder, and, of course, that just encouraged me. “Oh, sweetheart, don’t get all worked up about it. I promise I won’t cut myself. Really, darling, I’m perfectly fine. See, I haven’t cut off any fingers . . . yet.”

I was having a great laugh. I wrapped my arm around Nik and gave her a big hug. “And you think I’m the goofy one,” I said between giggles.

After a few seconds I let her go. She looked at me kind of sheepishly and said, “Sorry.”

I just laughed. “Why? I’m know I’m very sweet . . . and dear . . . oh, and let’s not forget adorable . . . .”

“Or conceited,” Nik chimed in, which earned her a whack on the shoulder.

She grinned at me and gave me the knife back – I think a bit reluctantly. “Be careful. I don’t want to spend the rest of the evening in the hospital getting your fingers sewn back on.”

I stuck my tongue out at her and went back to my chopping. Okay, so I immediately almost sliced my finger . . . but I was good.

Nik grabbed a bowl – she was figuring out my system in the cupboards – and threw the salad together. She tossed it with a dressing she had made – not just one from a bottle! I was in awe again. Was there anything this woman couldn’t do?

She pulled the casserole out while I set the table. When we were seated Nik held out her hand and I took it without hesitation.

“Why don’t I do this one,” I insisted.

Nik smiled and nodded.

I didn’t bow my head. I just stared straight at her. “I’m ever so thankful for meeting the most wonderful person in the world and for getting to know her a little better. I’m thankful that she generously opened her home to me and took me in when I really needed it . . . and made me feel safe . . . when I really needed it.” I gave he a big, beaming smile. I could barely contain myself. “I’m so very thankful for you, Nicole Harris. And I hope I get to be a part of your life for a long, long time.”

Maybe I was a little over the top. Nik was blushing again – although not quite as badly as earlier – and her eyes had shyly fallen. But it was honestly how I felt.

I gave her hand a little squeeze. When she looked up at me, I said, “That’s it. Now we can eat . . . dear.”

Yep, that got her. She was turning red again while I giggled.

Not surprisingly, the meal was fantastic. I made so many yummy noises that I think Nik was getting embarrassed all over again. 

When we were finished, I told her, for the hundredth time, “That was fantastic.” I gave her a little grin. “If your meals are always this good, I’m going to be five hundred pounds in no time.”

Nik couldn’t help giggling at that.

She glanced across the room, and then suddenly jumped up. “Come on,” she said, taking my hand and dragging me towards the door. She made me grab my coat and then lead me up to the roof. We stood there and watched as the sun began to sink below the horizon. Nik slipped an arm around me and I just naturally leaned my head on her shoulder as we watched the magic of the sunset. We didn’t speak at all. There was nothing that needed to be said. Standing there with her, watching the glorious show in front of us seemed like the most wonderful, peaceful moment there ever could be. We didn’t move until the sun was down and we started to see stars peaking out on the eastern horizon. 

“We’d better get back,” Nik said quietly. “I’ve got to work tonight, remember? I’m going to have to start getting ready.”

Honestly, I hadn’t remembered. Maybe I’d just blocked it out because I was enjoying spending time with her so much.

\--------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------

She stood at the door, giving me a searching look. “Are you sure you’re going to be okay by yourself?”

I felt like I was fourteen again and my parents were heading off for the day and leaving me at home alone. So I did what I did with my parents – I rolled my eyes and sighed. “Yes, I’ll be fine,” I told her.

She didn’t look totally convinced.

I took her hand and gave it a little squeeze. “I appreciate that you care so much, but I’m a full grown adult. I can manage a whole night on my own.” I gave her a patient little smile and added, “I’ve actually done it before, you know.”

She still looked a bit skeptical. “You can sleep in my bed if you want . . . since I’m not here. I’m sure it’s more comfortable.” With a smile she added, “And it’s not like you haven’t been sleeping in it already.”

“I don’t need to . . . .” I started but she interrupted me. 

“Just do it,” she said firmly.

We stood staring at each other until I finally nodded. “Okay,” I said. I did actually appreciate it.

That got a small smile out of her. “Where’s your phone?” she asked. “Why don’t you go get it.”

I was a little uncertain what she wanted, but I did as she asked. 

She had me unlock it, and then she started typing into it. “I’m putting my numbers into your contacts. The first in my cell number and the other is the number at the desk, if it’s an emergency and you really need to get in touch with of me. I don’t carry my cell on me at work, so you can’t always get me at that number.”

She looked up at me and smiled. “You should have my number anyway, just in case you need to get me or let me know something.”

She handed back my phone and then dug her own phone out of her purse. “I should add you to my contacts too.”

When she looked up at me I was smiling. I happily gave her my number.

She checked the time on her phone. “Okay, I really have to go.” She gave me a warm smile. “Have a good night . . . and call if you need to. Okay? Promise?”

When I didn’t immediately nod, she repeated, “Okay?” only much more insistently.

“Yes, mom,” I said, and then grinned.

“You are such a brat,” she muttered. She hesitated, and then gave me a big hug. I squeezed her just as hard.

As she opened the door she turned and gave me one last big smile. “Have a good night.”

I smiled back. “I will. You have a good night too . . . dear.”

I think I was a little disappointed it didn’t seem to embarrass her like it had earlier. She just paused, grinned, and then stuck her tongue out at me. “Later . . . sweetie,” she said, and then she was gone.

I couldn’t help laughing.

\--------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------

The evening went by quickly. I did the dishes and then distracted myself by doing some reading and trying to organize myself for the upcoming week. 

I didn’t have early classes on Monday – the first one wasn’t until ten – but I usually liked to get there early and do a bit of studying. I typically would have left between eight and eight thirty, but I wanted to stick around at least until Nik got home. It made me smile thinking about catching her in the morning before I headed off for my day at school.

“God, what a difference a single weekend makes,” I thought. I was just feeling so much happier and more positive. I had no doubts my new attitude would show in my school work. “And maybe I won’t be such a cranky bitch all the time.” I was sure the people around me would appreciate that.

I got washed up and changed and crawled into bed – Nik’s bed – about ten. I did a little more reading, but my eyelids started to get heavy about ten thirty, so I turned out the light and snuggled up under the covers. 

I’d just gotten comfortable when my phone rang. I looked at it, and smiled when I saw it was Nik.

“Hello, mom, calling to check up on me, are you?” That’s how I answered. I was being very flippant, but to be honest, I actually did really appreciate that she was calling to see how I was.

“Hey, Liv, just thought I’d call . . . not to check up on you . . . just to make sure there wasn’t anything you needed that you couldn’t find. You know how to work the alarm clock and everything?”

I smiled. She was definitely checking up on me. It always feels good knowing that other people care about you enough to do that. “I set an alarm on my phone . . . and otherwise, I think I’m all good.”

“Are you in bed?”

“Uh huh.”

“In my bed?” She said that a little quieter. 

I smiled. “I’m thinking of calling it our bed.”

She laughed. “I’m okay with that if you want.”

“How’s work going?”

“Not too bad. It’s generally busy when I first get in, getting everyone settled for the night . . . but then it’s usually quieter. To be honest, I actually like it when it’s busier. Time just kind of drags when there's nothing going on, you know.”

“Yeah, that’s what I find too. I like it at work when it’s busy.”

We were both quiet for a bit. Finally Nik spoke. “Well, I just wanted to check on . . . .”

“Ah-ha,” I interrupted. “So you were checking on me!”

She laughed softly. ‘Yes. Okay. I was checking on you. It’s your first night alone, so I wanted to make sure you were okay. Is there anything wrong with that?”

“No.” I responded in a soft voice. “It’s very sweet . . . and I appreciate it. I appreciate how much you care. It makes me feel good.” I’m not always a goof. Sometimes I’m very good at saying what I really feel.

There was another long pause, before Nik said, “I’m glad.” After a couple of seconds she added, “Like I said, it’s not that busy around her at night, so if you do need to talk, call me . . . whenever. It’s not like I’m going to be sleeping.”

I thanked her again . . . thoroughly . . . and then we said our ‘good nights’.

After I hung up I was smiling and I felt warm and happy inside. “She’s just such a good friend,” I thought, and for the millionth time I thanked god – even if I didn’t believe in any god – that I’d met Nik.

I snuggled back into the bed, but I didn’t fall asleep immediately. I was a little bit restless. I decided it wasn’t near as comfortable not have Nik to cuddle up with. 

“You better keep that to yourself,” I thought, “Or your new roommate’s going to start thinking you’re kind of weird.” 

I rolled around a bit, trying to find a position that was just right. Finally I grabbed Nik’s pillow and hugged it to me. I buried my face in it and was happy to find the scent of fresh flowers that reminded me of Nik. It made me smile again. It was almost like a little bit of her was there with me. I found that comforting. I fell asleep like that, hugging her pillow. “Another detail I probably shouldn’t share,” I thought as I drifted off.

I did wake a little bit tense a couple of times that night, but I found I was able to calm myself back down. Needless to say, I found it helped hugging Nik’s pillow and breathing in her scent. I assumed I had just come to associate her with a sense of feeling safe. Whatever the reason, it helped, and I got back to sleep without too much trouble.


	7. Chapter 7

I woke up in the morning feeling well rested. 

I got up, made the bed, showered, got myself ready, had a bowl of cereal and a glass of orange juice, and was all set to go by eight o’clock. I put my backpack by the door, but grabbed a book out and curled up in the big wingback chair to read. 

Finally, at about quarter to nine, I heard a key in the lock. I felt a huge smile spread across my face as I got up and headed over to greet Nik. When she came in she looked a bit tired, but when she saw me she began smiling too.

“Morning,” she said.

“Morning . . . dear,” I replied with a little smirk.

She just grinned back at me. “You’re never going to forget that, are you?”

“Oh I’ve got an fantastic memory. You’d be amazed how long I can hold on to things,” I teased.

We just stood there smiling at each other for a minute. Finally Nik asked, “So how was your night?”

“Great,” I told her, as if it were no big deal.

She paused a second. “Really?” she asked. Her tone was firm, but definitely caring. 

I thought she probably used that tone a lot at work. I was thinking she probably used it often on macho guys who didn’t want to admit their problems. I was no macho guy, but . . . .

“I woke up a couple of times,” I finally told her. “But I got myself calmed down and I got back to sleep.”

She nodded and gave me a little smile. I could see she was happy for me.

It suddenly dawned on me. “I think sleeping in your bed helped.” I felt a little sheepish as I added, “I guess it’s kind of what I associated with being safe those other nights . . . so I think it helped just being there.” I didn’t add anything about her pillow or her scent. No point making the moment awkward.

Nik just nodded like it made perfect sense. “Well, you‘d better sleep there again tonight.”

I smiled. “Sure,” I told her. I glanced down at my watch. “Hey, I’ve got to get going. I don’t want to be late for class.”

“Okay, have a great day,” she told me. She held her arms open and I stepped in and gave her a big hug without even thinking about it. 

When we separated, I looked at her. “You look a little tired.” It was my turn to be the mother. “You should go get some sleep, or have a cup of coffee or something to wake yourself up.”

Nik just looked at me for a second, and then said, “I don’t drink coffee, actually.”

I blinked and looked at her. I thought about it, and then smiled in amazement. I turned my eyes back to her and said, “You’re right. I’ve never seen you drink coffee.” I glanced around the kitchen and sure enough, there wasn’t even a coffee maker.

I laughed. “I didn’t even notice. And I thought I was the only person in the whole country who didn’t drink coffee. Can you believe it.” I gave her a big smile. “Just another sign we were meant for each other.”

Nik got a bit of a strange look on her face, just for a second, but then smiled back at me. “I guess we were,” she agreed.

I glanced at my watch again and felt a little jolt of panic. My bus was coming soon. “I’ve got to go,” I shouted. I gave her another quick hug and told her, “Have a great day.”

“You too,” Nik said as I opened the door. “By the way, what time will you be home?”

I paused and looked at her. “Uhh . . . .”

She waved me off. “Text me . . . let me know . . . if you want some supper.”

I smiled and nodded eagerly. “Yeah, definitely,” I told her. I gave her a little wave, and then ran for it.

\--------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------

I’d caught my bus – just barely – and made it to my class. I had two classes on Monday and a two hour lab. It was one of my busier days. 

My lab ended at four, and usually I went to the library and studied for a couple of hours afterwards. I did go to the library, but after an hour I found myself getting distracted. I kept thinking about hanging out with Nik back at the apartment. Maybe I was thinking about the prospects of another yummy supper too. 

I had texted Nik in the morning to say I’d probably be back about six thirty or seven, but I decided I could study later, after she’d gone to work. I texted her, “Change of plans. Leaving now. Probably be about half an hour.” 

A few seconds later she texted back, “K, sounds good. See ya soon.” I was just finishing that text when another one arrived, adding “. . . dear!”

I let out a loud, snorting laugh that drew the stares of everyone around me. I didn’t care. It was funny.

We sent a few more texts back and forth, until she finally said, “Gotta go if you want supper.”

I responded, “Definitely want supper. Yum!” 

I tried reading on the bus, but my mind kept wandering off. It seemed to take forever, but finally we hit my stop and I was there.

When I entered the apartment, it smelled wonderful . . . again. I could get use to this, I decided quite quickly. I was just hoping Nik didn’t decide it was my turn to cook one of these nights. I was pretty sure, though, that she’d already come to realize I wasn’t that handy – or safe – in the kitchen.

She gave me a little wave from over by the stove, but had her attention on something that she was working on. I hung up my coat, and then came up behind her and gave her a hug.

“It smells wonderful in here. What are you making me for supper tonight?” I asked as I gave her a big squeeze.

She glanced back over her shoulder at me and gave me a smile. “I’m making _us_ ,” and she emphasized that last word, “a little pasta. I just need to finish sautéing these vegetables, then I can add them to the sauce and we’ll be ready.” 

Nik glanced around the stove, as if to confirm her assessment. “Yep, the pasta’s all ready . . . .” She turned to the toaster oven on the counter. “It looks like the garlic bread is just about done.” Her eyes swung back around to me. “If you set the table, we can probably eat in about five minutes.”

“You’ve got nothing that needs chopping, then?” I asked. I had that cheesy grin of mine on my face.

She gave me an almost alarmed look and said, “Thank god, no. I don’t think I could watch that again.”

We both laughed. Yep, I was positive she knew I didn’t belong in the kitchen. Smart girl!

As promised, in five minutes we were sitting down, giving thanks, and then digging in. Everything tasted as good as it smelled. 

I was hoping Nik wasn’t getting sick of me going on and on about her cooking – from her happy little smile I didn’t get that impression – because I really couldn’t stop telling her just how amazing things were.

I had a good sized serving . . . and then had some more. Really, it was that good. I decided I was going to have to get myself under control or my joke about getting to be five hundred pounds was going to come true. “Maybe I’ll start . . . after this meal,” I thought.

When we were done, Nik asked, “Do you want to go up to the roof?”

I nodded eagerly. 

As we started up the stairs Nik couldn’t resist teasing me. “After all you ate, you could probably use this exercise.”

“Hey,” I shouted and gave her a shot in the arm. I did my best little pout. “That’s not nice.”

Nik gave me a little hug. “Sorry.” After a second she added, “I’m just amazed that someone as small as you can eat that much pasta.”

I smiled up at her. “It was so good, though . . . so it’s all your fault.” After a second I added, “Besides, I’ve got a high metabolism . . . I hope.”

She was giving me her, ‘you’re such a goof’ grin as she gave me another little hug. 

“I like cooking for you,” she confessed. 

I just smiled at her. “I’m glad.”

When we got to the roof, we had the same spectacular show we’d seen the night before. I stood there, quietly, with Nik. It was amazing. And I felt so happy and contented. I just couldn’t imagine anything being any better.

We spent the rest of the evening lounging on the couch until Nik had to get ready for work. We chatted a bit, but for much of it we just sat there enjoying each other’s company. I was leaned up against Nik, just admiring the tattoos on her arm. 

It’s odd, but the silence never felt uncomfortable . . . quite the opposite, it seemed very relaxing and peaceful.

I gave her a big hug when she left, and then cleaned up and tried to study one more time. I got a bit done, but I was still kind of unfocused.

When I crawled into bed, I grabbed Nik’s pillow again, hugged it to me and buried my face into it. I decided it had maybe the one smell I liked better than Nik’s cooking.

She gave me another call, just to check up on me, but I really didn’t mind. It was nice having a quick chat with her right before I went to sleep. It was very calming.

That night I slept wonderfully. I couldn’t quite remember what I’d dreamed about, but I woke up smiling and feeling happy. 


	8. Chapter 8

Tuesday was my long day. I had two classes during the day, but I also had a three hour night class from six thirty to nine thirty. It was a real killer, but it was a class I really wanted, and a professor I really wanted, so it was my only option for fitting it into my schedule.

When I saw Nik that morning, I warned her that I wouldn’t be home until late. She insisted on packaging up some of the pasta from the previous night so I’d have something to eat. I didn’t complain. I didn’t even say, “Ah, mom,” and roll my eyes.

Instead, I gave her an extra big hug when I left and thanked her.

My other classes ended at two, so I usually took advantage of the long break for reading and working on assignments. I knew I’d been kind of distracted lately, so I decided I had to get a bit serious and really dig in. 

An hour later, though, I was daydreaming and wonder if I could sneak back to the apartment for the afternoon and then come back for the evening class. I seriously considered it . . . and then finally gave my head a shake and got back to my studying.

At five thirty I took a break and had the pasta. It still tasted amazing, even microwaved. Besides, I was saving money on meals, which was a good thing.

I glanced out the windows of the building and noticed the sun was going down. The view didn’t compare to up on our roof, but it still stirred up those warm feelings.

I pulled out my phone and decided to called Nik. It rang three times, and I was just about to hang up when she answered. “Hey there,” she said in a dreamy voice.

I wondered if she had been sleeping and felt a little bad.

“Hey, how’s it going?”

“Great.”

“Are you up on the roof?”

“Uh-huh.”

That made me smile. “How’s the sunset tonight?”

“It’s great . . . but it’s not as good as when you’re here.” 

That made my smile grow. It was so big it was almost painful.

“Well, I guess it’s kind of like I’m there now.”

She took a few seconds. “It is better . . . but it’s still not quite the same as when you’re actually here.”

I could understand. “Yeah, I wish I was there too.”

We didn’t say anything for a long time, but I was reluctant to hang up. I just closed my eyes and imagined being there . . . seeing the pinks and purples tinging the sky as the sun sank . . . and feeling Nik there beside me. Like she said, it wasn’t quite as good . . . but it was still pretty good.

Finally, after what I’m sure was several minutes, I asked, “Nik?”

“Um-hum.” She still sounded dreamy.

“You sound like you’re enjoying yourself”

“Oh yeah.” She giggled. “I might have had a couple of glasses of wine . . . I think maybe that’s helping.”

I laughed. “How come you didn’t pack that with my supper?”

She laughed too. “You’ve got your class, remember. You need to be all sharp and serious.”

“Oh, yeah,” I said, and I sounded sad, even to me. It was a class I really loved – and that was totally relevant to journalism, which I wanted to get into – but for whatever reason, I wasn’t feeling enthused for it that night. Maybe it was because it ran so late or because it was such a long class.

I signed. Whatever the reason, I knew I wouldn’t skip the class.

I checked out the time and knew I had to get going. I had to head across campus for the class, and I wanted to use the washroom first.

I checked the time again, trying to figure if maybe I could stretch it a bit longer. I bit my lip. Nope, I’d already pushed it. I really had to go.

“Hey, Nik, I’ve got to get going . . . my class starts pretty soon.”

“Yeah, I figured,” she responded. She sounded kind of sad now too. Was my mood infectious?

“Okay, see you later.”

“Yeah. Have a good class. Learn lots.”

“Oh, and remember, whatever dishes you dirtied tonight . . . you have to wash!” I giggled as I said it.

“Oh, don’t worry, dear . . . .” This time, the way she said ‘dear’ sounded more like a curse. “. . . I’ll get right on washing those dishes . . . when I have a free moment.”

I laughed at her, and in a second she was laughing too.

“Okay, bye now. Don’t wait up if you feel tired. I’ll see you later.”

She said her good-bye and she was gone. I found myself smiling down at me phone.

Then I caught sight of the time and said, “Ah shit.” I gathered up my backpack and headed off at a trot. Yeah, I was going to be late . . . and there wasn’t going to be time for a washroom stop.

\--------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------

One of the problems with my late night class was that the busses didn’t run nearly as frequently afterwards. The usual bus I’d catch didn’t even run, so I had to catch one bus, and then transfer to a second one to get home. It all took longer than normal, and after such a long day, I really just wanted to get home and go to bed.

When I finally got off at my stop I had to walk a couple of blocks to our building. I’d never really thought about it before, but that night I found myself kind of nervous and skittish during the walk. “God, how many ways is that whole incident with those assholes going to affect me,” I wondered. I breathed a big sigh of relief when I finally got to the apartment.

It was a little after ten by the time I got there. I slipped in quietly. I figured after two twelve hour night shifts, Nik might be beat.

Nik had left a light on in the living room for me, and I was happy to see there was still a light on in her bedroom. She hadn’t made up a bed for me on the couch, which I guess surprised me a little. “No problem,” I thought. “I can handle that. She was probably tired.” 

“But who’s going to tuck you in?” I heard a whiny voice in my head demand. I grinned.

Nik had her bedside light on, and her tablet was on her lap, but her eyes were closed. I found myself watching her for a moment and smiling. I decided maybe I should tuck her in, for a change.

I’d just taken a step into her room when her heavy eyes opened. She looked over at me and gave me a huge, though very sleepy, smile. 

“You’re home,” she said in her dreamy voice. I don’t think it was the wine this time. I think maybe she really had been dreaming.

“I am. Sorry if I woke you.”

She shook her head. “Nope, I’ve been waiting up for you.”

I thought of pointing out that she’d actually been sleeping, but I didn’t.

“I didn’t make up the couch,” she said. She flipped back the sheets on the bed beside her. “You can sleep in here again.”

I smiled. She was so considerate. Or maybe I just liked the idea. I did sleep so well when I was with her. But I knew she was tired and I didn’t want to disturb her.

“Thanks, Nik, but I can make up the couch. It’s no big deal.”

“Um-uh,” she said, shaking her head. Her eyes were drifting closed, but her voice sounded firm. She patted the bed beside her. “You sleep here. Now hurry, before I fall asleep.”

It was late, so I decided not to argue any more. I just nodded, and then realizing her eyes were closed said, “Okay. I’ll be right back.”

I quickly went to the bathroom, washed up, changed and slipped into the bedroom. Nik’s breathing was soft and steady, so I was pretty sure she was asleep. I went around to her side of the bed, took the tablet off her lap and turned off her light. I felt my way around to the other side of the bed and slipped in as carefully as I could, not wanting to wake her. I’d just pulled the blankets up, though, when she rolled over, snuggled up against and wrapped an arm around me.

“Good night, dear,” she whispered and gave me a little kiss on the cheek.

Almost immediately she seemed to resume that slow, steady breathing. She was out again. Amazing.

I looked over my shoulder at her. I put my hand on hers, gave it a soft little squeeze, and said, “Good night, Nik.”

I closed my eyes. I was tired too. It had been a long, exhausting day. But I lay there for a minute or two and just felt thankful for everything I had. “Thank you, Nik,” I whispered, before I snuggled ever so carefully against her and slipped away into my dreams.


	9. Chapter 9

Wednesday morning we both woke up fully revived. While I got ready, Nik headed into the kitchen and whipped me up an omelet with mushrooms and cheese and tomatoes. What a surprise – it tasted great.

“God, I think my clothes are starting to feel tighter already,” I whined as I checked out the waistband on my jeans.

Nik crossed her arms. “Are you complaining?” she demanded.

I shook my head. “Nope, not me.” I grinned up at her. “I figure I can always buy one of those big muumuus when I outgrow all my clothes.”

Nik let out a little laugh. 

“I’m just worried I’ll be too big to fit on the couch,” I continued.

She eyed me and then said, “I guess you’ll just have to sleep in my bed all the time, then.”

I grinned. “Oh, I’m not sure there’ll be room there for you. You might have to take the couch.”

She laughed. “Okay, that’s it then. We start your diet tonight. I’m thinking of having steak, but I’ll get you a celery stalk and half an apple.”

We were both giggling. I happened to glace over into the kitchen. “I noticed you still had your dishes in the sink from last night. You were going to take care of them, right . . . you know . . . with all your free time.”

She looked off like she either wasn’t listening to me or she had no idea what I was talking about. “Oh yeah, I’m sure I’ll get to them,” she said. Her tone didn’t inspire confidence.

I finished getting ready. Nik met me at the door.

“Have a good day,” she told me.

“You too. I should be home around five thirty or so.”

“I’ll try to have your celery stalk ready by then.”

She was a real comedian. Well, she must have been, because I laughed.

“Okay, bye,” she said.

I just stood there. I gave her a little pout. “Hey, where’s my hug?”

That put a huge grin on her face. She stepped up, wrapped her arms around me and squeezed me ferociously. 

“That’s better,” I muttered as I squeezed her right back.

She stepped back. She was still grinning. “You’re getting a little spoiled, aren’t you?”

I nodded. “Yep, but it’s all your fault. You can’t blame anybody else, so don’t even try.”

She gave her head a little shake, but her grin didn’t falter. “You really are a total goof.”

“Good thing I’m so amusing . . . and adorable.” It was getting to be my standard response.

Nik just nodded and said, “Good thing. Now get going, or you’re going to miss your bus.”

She was right about that. I was running for the bus once again.

\--------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------

All the way to school I stood staring out the window (yeah, there were no gentlemen offering up seats . . . not that I really needed one). I found myself thinking about Nik . . . and me. 

I’d never had a friend like Nik. Sure, we’d only known each other for a short time, but I already felt closer to her than I did to friends I’d known for years. If somebody asked, I couldn’t even tell you what it was about us that clicked. We had very different backgrounds and did very different things, but I guess, maybe, deep down, we kind of saw the world the same and felt the same about all those things that were important in life. It was just one of those strange, psychic connections – not that I believed in that kind of stuff. I was thinking this must be what it was like when people talked about finding a soul mate. 

Everything about her just seemed so wonderful and genuine. And she was really good looking. “How has some guy not snatched her up,” I wondered. 

Which made me think that maybe she hadn’t had the greatest luck with men. I realized she’d never talked about boyfriends or dates or any of that. 

“That would figure,” I thought. I’d seen it a few times. Women who seemed absolutely wonderful, but who were hopeless at picking boyfriends. We all know that friend who seem to pick the wrong kind of guy every single time. You just ached for them, but it’s like they can’t help themselves. 

Maybe that was nature balancing things out. If you’re great at some aspects of your life, you have to completely suck at others. No one is allowed to be totally, completely happy and contented. I really hoped that wasn’t the case with Nik.

Wednesday was a pretty good day for me at school – only two, one-hour classes. I was done by two in the afternoon, but then I headed over to the library to get serious about my studying. For a change I did not too badly. I felt pretty good about myself when five o’clock rolled around, so I packed things up and headed home.

I texted Nik from the bus, just so she’d know. She texted back, “Celery stalk’s all ready.” Okay, who was the goof here?

I was smiling and feeling great when I walked in the front door of the apartment. I had my head down, digging in my purse for the key to the security door when it swung open. I looked up to thank the person and found myself staring at Tyler – one of the asshole buddies of Lindsey’s boyfriend.

He ran his eyes over me like he was starving and I was a Big Mac, with fries – even though I was wearing a coat that pretty much covered everything that guys like him were interested in. He gave me a smirk and said, “Well, if it isn’t luscious Livi. Hey, haven’t seen you around for a while.” His smirk widened. “Tommy said he’s seen you hanging around with that dyke down on three.” Now it turned into an ugly leer. “So have you two been getting friendly or something?”

I’d had enough before he’d even opened his mouth. He’d just kind of surprised me, though, so I’d been caught off-guard. I guess I really hadn’t thought that even though I’d moved, these guys were still lurking around the building. 

I got myself together, though. I gave him my biggest bitch glare. “Fuck you, Tyler, you loser. Get the fuck out of my way.” I pushed past him into the building. Once I was inside I turned on him. “Don’t even talk to me . . . you or your fucking asshole friends.”

Of course he gave me the big, “Oooh,” and then the smirk was back. “Does your mother know the kind of shit that comes out of that lovely mouth of yours?” he said, and then laughed. I guess he was amused by himself.

I looked at him with utter revulsion. “Does you mother know what kind of shit you have for brains,” I responded in an icy tone that could have frozen water.

He stood there with his mouth hanging open, too stupid to think of a comeback. Instead he just said, “Bitch.”

I gave him a cruel laugh. I realized later I was kind of baiting him, which I guess wasn’t the smartest thing to be doing, but I was so pissed I couldn’t stop myself. “Fuck you, loser,” I said, and then turned and walked away while he sputtered out more lame nonsense. Okay, mine was not the greatest comeback either, but I was so ready to be done with that loser.

I still had the keys in my hands, and I slipped them between my fist, so they were sticking out through my fingers. I’d seen somewhere to do that to protect yourself. I didn’t think Tyler had the balls to do anything, but I really wasn’t ready to take a chance.

By the time I got to the apartment, I was coming down off my adrenalin rush. I found my hands were shaking so much that I had to use both of them to get the key in the lock.

When I walked in Nik looked up from the couch and smiling, but obviously the look on my face told her something was wrong. She jumped up and came over immediately.

She put her hands on my shoulders and stared intently at me. “Liv, what’s wrong?”

I was trembling and doing my best to fight back tears. Of course, being me, I said, “Nothing.” My weak, shaky voice sounded pathetic.

Naturally, Nik wasn’t taking that. “Liv?” she said firmly. Her eyes bored into me.

I closed my eyes and took a deep, ragged breath. When I opened them again, I’d regained a little bit of composure. I looked up into Nik’s anxious eyes and gave her a weak smile. “I ran into one of those assholes in the lobby,” I told her. 

She didn’t say anything. She just watched me very carefully. 

“Fucking Tyler,” I added, as if that clarified things any.

Nik remained quiet for a few seconds. Finally, I saw a little smile touch the corner of her lips. “So do I have to go down there and scrape the loser up off the floor?”

That made me laugh. I gave her a big hug, and by the time I’d stepped back I was already starting to feel better. “I just got so mad,” I told her

She grinned. “Really? I just can’t even imagine it.”

Was she making fun of me? I gave her a little shot on the arm. 

“I can be scary when I get mad,” I told her firmly.

Her grin became a smirk. That was _not_ better. Yeah, I found it kind of annoying. 

“I’m serious,” I protested. “You don’t ever want to make me angry.”

“Oh, I believe you,” she insisted, but I thought I caught a little eye roll when she said it.

“Oh . . . damn you, Nichole Harris, you’re about to find out just how bad I can get,” I shouted.

I jumped at her and started raining blows on her. Okay, they were light, playful blows, but I’m sure she got the idea just how scary I could be if I was really angry.

It must have been terrifying, because soon I had her down on her knees on the floor. The fact that she was laughing so hard she was crying, I’m sure, had nothing to do with it.

I wore myself out pretty quickly – god, I was in pathetic shape – so I stopped. As I stood over her I said, “I’m going to take pity on you, because you’re my friend. I just hope you’ve learned how dangerous it can be if you piss me off.”

“Oh yeah . . . I have,” she gasped between breaths. She was still giggling a lot and wiping her eyes.

“Sorry I made you cry,” I told her. “I didn’t mean to be that hard on you.”

That just brought on a new bout of laughter. Maybe I couldn’t take people out with my fists. Good thing my jokes were a lethal weapon.

I eventually pulled her back up. I hugged her and said, “I hoped you’ve learned your lesson.”

She looked down at me. She was grinning. “I really have,” she told me. “I’m going to live in fear of you from now on . . . that’s for sure.”

I gave her a satisfied little smile. “As you should,” I told her, and then I laughed too. I hugged her again and said a quiet, “Thanks.”

She looked at me, so I added, “For helping me get past having to deal with that asshole.”

She shrugged. “No problem.”

As we stood there I happened to glance over at the kitchen table. It was set for supper, and I notice that on my plate there was a single celery stalk. I gave Nik a look that was maybe a little less thankful.

She was getting a lot of use out of that smirk tonight, because it was back and it was just as annoying as last time.

“Ha ha, very funny,” I told her in a less than adorable way. I guess she really hadn’t learned her lesson! 

I suddenly realized there weren’t any of those yummy smells that I’d gotten so use to. I looked up at her and I’m sure the disappointment showed on my face. Okay, maybe I was getting a little spoiled.

I’m not terribly good at hiding my feeling, so I think Nik could read every thought that was running through my head. Now, apparently, I was being quite amusing, because she was grinning like something was terribly funny.

“What?” I asked, but I was pretty sure I knew exactly what she was laughing at.

“You look disappointed.”

I tried to be nonchalant. I casually shrugged. “I guess I was just wondering what was for dinner . . . unless you wanted me to make something.” 

When I said the last part I grinned right back at her. I saw her cringe in mock fear.

“No!” she said quickly. “That’s fine. I’ll think of something.”

I gave her a little shot on the shoulder. “I’m not that bad in the kitchen . . . ,” I said with a little laugh, but then somewhat less certain I asked, “. . . am I?”

Nik gave me a warm smile. “You’re not that bad,” she reassured me. “And I did make something . . . besides your celery.”

I walked over, picked up the celery and took a big, crunching bite. I actually liked celery. I probably could have gotten by on a few stalks. That was the kind of meal I was making for myself when I was living with Lindsey. Well, I might have supplemented it with a couple of Oreos. You have to have balance in your diet.

Nik had actually made a big, fresh salad, plus had picked up a fresh loaf of sourdough bread from the local bakery. It so happened I loved sourdough bread. I toasted a piece and coated it in butter. I was in heaven. 

Once again I felt like saying, “Thanks, mom, for taking such good care of me.” This really was the kind of meal I loved.

When we were done, Nik produced a bottle of wine from the fridge. It was a sweet Moscato, which it just so happened I also loved. 

I’m not really a big drinker, but I do like a glass of wine now and again. 

Nik got down a couple of plastic cups from the cupboard and poured a generous amount in each.

I arched an eyebrow. “Um, getting out the fancy wine glasses for me are you? I suppose you’re afraid I might get drunk and break you good ones.” Maybe I was being a little sensitive after all the shots about how hazardous I was in the kitchen.

Nik just laughed, though. “No, silly, I thought we’d take these up to the roof. These glasses are a little less obvious than actual wine glasses.”

I thought that did sound like a wonderful idea. We grabbed our coats and headed up the stairs. 

The skies were partly cloudy, but that just made for an extra spectacular sunset. I slipped an arm around Nik and rested my head on her shoulder as I sipped my wine. 

This was one new routine that I was truly loving. Watching the sunset just seemed to calm me and fill my whole body with joy and contentment. Whatever had happened in the day – including having to deal with asshole losers like Tyler – just seemed to wash away, leaving me feeling completely relaxed and peaceful.

By the time we got back down to the apartment, I felt incredibly mellow. Okay, the wine might have had something to do with it.

I reluctantly cleared off the table. That’s when I noticed there weren't any dirty dishes piled up in the sink. I looked over at Nik. In a tone that might have sounded a little shocked I asked, “Did you wash the dishes?”

She almost looked kind of sheepish, like I’d caught her doing something she wasn’t supposed to. Well, actually, in my mind that wasn’t far from the truth. 

I put my hands on my hips and gave her my best stern look. “Nik I told you, I’ll do the dishes.” I tried to be pretty insistent.

She just shrugged. “Well, I dirtied them all . . . and besides, you were out late last night and I wasn’t doing anything today.”

That was a weak excuse, I decided. I continued to scold her. “You listen to me, Nicole. You do all the cooking around here, so I will do the dishes. Do you understand me.”

It suddenly dawned on me that I had a ‘mom’ voice too. I didn’t know whether to cringe or be impressed.

Nik just nodded, finally, and said, “Okay.”

As I set the dishes from our dinner in the sink she asked, “So did you want to wash those up now?”

I was quickly slipping back into the mellowness I’d had when we’d first come back down from the roof. Had I backed myself into a corner? No, I decided. So I played the, “Maybe I’ll do them in a little while. I think I just sit down and relax right now.”

I pulled up a seat on the couch beside Nik and closed my eyes. Yeah, I could have easily had a little nap right then. 

Nik had other plans, though. She gave me a little poke in the side. “Hey, I’ve got good news for you.”

When I looked over at her, I’m sure I looked more tired than interested. “Yeah, what?” I asked with very little enthusiasm. 

“I was talking to a buddy of mine today, and he said he can get you a bed for your room, if you want it.”

So I wasn’t destined to remain on the couch forever? I was a little bit interested.

Nik continued. “He said it’s just a single . . . which I suppose is all we can really fit in that room . . . but it’s free.”

Now I was even more interested. I was a little hesitant, though. “Uh, I wonder what kind of shape it’s in?”

“Damon says it’s in good shape. Don’t worry, I asked him. He said he can bring it over on Saturday if you’re interested.”

Now I was smiling. “Um, yeah, I guess I’m interested.”

Nik was smiling too. It was starting to feel like this was more of a permanent arrangement, rather than just a friend crashing for a few nights. That made me feel happy.

“I guess we’re going to have to move stuff around in that room so you can fit the bed in,” Nik said, thoughtfully.

She glanced at me. “Did you want to get started on that now?” 

“You seem very eager,” I commented with a little grin. “Are you getting tired of having to share your bed all the time.”

It was just an offhanded little comment, but I felt horrible because I thought I saw a hurt expression flash quickly across Nik’s face.

I reached out and grabbed her hand. “Oh, Nik, I’m sorry, I didn’t mean that,” I said immediately. “You’ve been so generous to me . . . .” 

I wasn’t sure how to say it, but I had no doubts that everything she’d done had been out of concern for me, and I knew she’d been totally selfless in it all. She’d always been there, every step of the way, always putting my needs first. I couldn’t honestly imagine a more generous friend.

“I was just trying to be funny,” I muttered. I’m sure I sounded pathetic. My eyes were downcast and I felt miserable. The wine might have been making me a little more melodramatic than usual.

Nik reached over, swept my hair back, and then cupped my chin and lifted my face until my eyes met hers. “It’s fine,” she said. “I know you were just joking.”

“I’m sorry,” I said again. It was totally heartfelt.

Nik gave me a little smile. “No, I’m sorry. I guess I should have warned you, I can get a little moody sometimes. So don’t worry about it. Sometimes there’s just things I have to work out.”

I looked at her. I think I had one of those adoring looks now. In a quiet voice I asked, “Is there anything I can do to help?

That brought a big smile to her face. She reached out and hugged me tightly against her. “I think you just being here helps me,” she said. In a quieter voice she added, “It’s nice having a friend who’s as wonderful as you.”

After a second, I found I couldn’t help myself. “Don’t forget, adorable,” I quipped.

That got a laugh from Nik. “Yes . . . adorable.”

I was on a roll. “And cute?”

Nik didn’t laugh this time. She paused, and then gave me a big squeeze. In a quiet voice she said, “Incredibly cute.”

She sounded a little strange, so I was quiet for a few seconds, trying to understand it, I guess. Then my silliness got the better of me. “And . . . ,” I started, but Nik cut me off. 

She gave me another big squeeze and laughed. “Why don’t you quit while you’re ahead?”

I laughed too and nestled against her. We stayed that way the rest of the evening – there on the couch – chatting a little but otherwise just enjoying each other’s company. 

When bedtime came, Nik looked at me and said, “After having to deal with that asshole today, I think you should just come sleep with me.”

I didn’t argue. I found a shy little smile on my lips as I said, “Okay.”


	10. Chapter 10

Thursday night I had a shift at work, so I came home about three thirty. Not surprisingly, Nik had an early supper ready for me before I headed off. She really was amazing. 

On Friday, she worked all day. I saw her in the morning, but she wasn’t home until quarter to nine. I had gone up to the roof, alone, to watch the sunset. I’d thought about calling her, but I didn’t know how busy she’d be. Instead I just sent her a text and attached a picture. It didn’t do it justice, of course. A few minutes later she called and we chatted for ten minutes or so. It wasn’t quite the same as being there with her, but it was pretty good.

When she got home, we just relaxed, watched a little TV and then went to bed. We didn’t ever really talk about it . . . we both just crawled into her bed.

She’d mentioned that she’d given her friend, Damon, my number so he could call when he got there. She’d told him I worked in the afternoon – I was working a half day again – so he’d promised to be there in the morning.

“Are you sure I even need my own bed,” I joked as we lay there. 

Nik was quiet for a minute, so I turned to take a look to make sure I hadn’t found some new way to offend her. 

She looked deep in thought. I wondered if maybe she hadn’t heard me, but after a bit she said, “It’s probably for the best . . . I guess.” After she spoke she gave me a little squeeze. “I’ll miss you, though.”

I was kind of touched. I realized I felt the same way. “Yeah, I’ll miss you too,” I confessed. 

We both just lay there quietly for a long time, until I finally drifted off to sleep.

\--------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------

The next morning I got up early to see Nik off to work. She had another twelve hour shift. I gave her a big hug at the door and told her to have a great day.

It was just as well I got up early, because at quarter after eight my phone rang. I didn’t recognize the number, but when I answered, I heard a gruff voice say, “Hey there, is this Olivia? This is Damon . . . Nik’s friend. I’m downstairs and I have a bed for you. Do you want to come down and give me a hand.”

When I got down to the ground floor I found a trim African American man, probably in his mid thirties. His hair was cut short – military style, I guess – he wore a camouflage jacket that looked military, and dark sunglasses, even though the sun didn’t penetrate down to the street in front of our building at that time of the morning. 

He seemed like one of those guys who was always in motion. Even when he introduced himself, he seemed to shift continually from one foot to the other. He was full of energy, but he wasn’t nervous or jittery. He just seemed like he was perpetually ready to get something done so he could move on to the next thing.

He wasn’t big, but he looked wiry, and when he shook my hand I thought he was going to crush it. 

“So you’re Olivia,” he said, looking me over. He gave me a little smile – not a creepy, checking me out smile, but a friendly smile – “Well, it really is a pleasure to meet you.”

He sounded so earnest that I was a little taken aback. Before I could think about it, though, he’d moved on.

“Okay, let’s get this bed inside and ready for use,” he said as he turned and headed off. He sounded like he was used to giving orders and getting things done. I was thinking that was a military thing too. 

He had an old pickup truck double parked on the street. He pulled a tarp off the back and I was thrilled to see a bed and mattress in it that looked almost brand new.

He must have seen my look, because he gave me that little smile again. “Don’t she look great? Like she was brand new. Yessir, you want things . . . anything . . . you come to Damon. See, Nik knew that. She knew to come to Damon.” He paused for a second, and then in a very serious tone added, “Nik knows I’d do almost anything for her. That’s true.”

Again, I didn’t really know what to make of that. I realized I had no idea of what kind of history Nik and Damon had. From what I knew about Nik, though, I wasn’t exactly shocked that people liked and respected her. She was such a giving person, I figured she’d probably helped many over the years, and most were probably grateful. Obviously, I could relate to that.

I tried to help, but Damon was clearly doing most – okay, maybe closer to all of the work. I ended up just getting doors for him while he easily carried the bedframe, mattress and box spring up to the apartment. 

I told him to just set them against the wall, because we still had to move stuff around in the bedroom so it would fit. 

He poked his head into the room. “Hey, this will just take a minute,” he told me, and the next thing I knew he was shifting around boxes and the desk, and then he was setting up the bed.

I noticed he paused and stared at the drawings on the wall – the drawings of the mysterious Sonja. They seemed to make him sad too. It made me wonder what the story was, but I didn’t feel right asking.

When he had everything in its place he seemed ready to hurry off. 

“Thank you so much,” I gushed. I really was very appreciative. 

“No, thank you,” he said. It was that ever so earnest voice again, like I had done him a huge favor. 

His comment left me a little puzzled.

He turned like he was going to leave, and then he paused. I got the feeling he was trying to decide something. Finally I guess he made up his mind.

He turned back to me. “Yes, thank you,” he repeated, and then I was surprised to see a huge smile spread across his face. For someone who seemed so stern and kind of gruff all the time, Damon had an incredible smile. It lit up his whole face and made his dark eyes sparkle. 

I felt a little amazed he was sharing a smile like that with me. I was unsure what I’d done to deserve it.

“Thank you,” he repeated again, and then added, “’Cause I gotta think that you’re the reason our Nik’s been so happy lately.” 

I found myself smiling back at him. This was news to me, but it certainly felt great to hear his words. Nik had been so good to me. It made me feel quite fantastic to know that maybe I’d been able to return the favor in some small way.

He waited a second, almost to let his words sink in, and then continued. “Nik is one special lady . . . and I don’t know anyone who deserves to be happy more than that one does.” His smile suddenly disappeared and he gave his head a sad little shake. “She’s had it so bad since . . . .”

He paused and glanced up at me, like he wasn’t sure he should go on.

I stood there, staring at him, silently urging him to continue. And then it occurred to me. “Sonja?”

The name seemed to make Damon wince. He slowly nodded his head, “Yep, since Sonja.” His voice was quiet and I could hear the sadness in it. 

He continued staring at me, like he was appraising me. “Do you know about Sonja?” he finally asked.

I was so tempted to nod my head. I was just so tempted to lie. But I couldn’t. It wasn’t even because I’m basically an honest person. It was because this was Nik . . . Nik’s life . . . and I wouldn’t have felt right prying into it . . . particularly by lying to one of her friends.

So I sadly shook my head. “I know when Nik mentioned her . . . that one time . . . she got so upset, so sad . . . . Can you tell me about her?”

Damon stared at me for a few long seconds. Finally he said, “Best Nik tells you about it . . . when she’s ready.”

I could see he was struggling with it a bit, so I nodded at him. “Yeah, that would probably be best,” I reluctantly agreed. 

We stood there quietly for another few moments. I think that was the stillest I’d seen Damon. Then, as if a switch had been flipped, he said, “Okay, young lady, I’ve got to be going. You take care of yourself, now, ya hear.”

He reached out and put a strong hand on my arm. His dark eyes looked deep into mine. “And like I told you, you take good care of our Nik.” His voice was firm and very serious. It sounded like an order.

I nodded. I was equally serious when I responded. “I will.”

I went with him downstairs to see him off. 

He paused in the little lobby and looked around. He turned to me. “Nik tells me you got some jackasses here in the building causing you grief. Maybe you’d like me and a couple of my buddies to drop by and pay them a visit . . . maybe encourage them to back off?”

I just grinned. I took it as a bit of a joke. But then I looked into Damon’s dark eyes and saw how hard and serious they’d gotten. 

It suddenly dawned on me. I didn’t know, but it was likely that during his time in the army he’d actually killed people. Damon may have seemed like a good guy to me, but I realized that he could probably be very dangerous in the wrong situation. 

Still, there was a part of me that wanted to accept his offer – even knowing this – and send him up to ‘have a little talk’ with those assholes. Apparently I still had some rage issues as far as they were concerned. But instead I just shook my head. I thanked him, sincerely, and said I’d keep it in mind, but for now it was fine.

He nodded, and then turned to leave. I followed him outside. I think I flustered him a bit when I thanked him again, profusely, and then gave him a big hug. 

“I really do appreciate it,” I told him. I gave him a little grin. “Even if I know you really did it for Nik.”

He nodded and gave me that tight little smile. “She really is a special lady . . . I hope you know that.”

I nodded. “Oh, believe me, I know.”

He slipped his sunglasses on and climbed into his truck. I gave him a little wave, but I could see he was just sitting there, staring straight ahead, like he was lost in thought again. I was a little surprised when I heard the whir of his window sliding down.

He turned to me and removed the glasses. His look was deadly serious. He locked his dark eyes on mine. When he spoke, his voice was grave. “You keep a close eye on Nik this next week or so . . . especially on the nineteenth. You’ll do that, right?”

It seemed part a very heartfelt request and part an order. I was confused.

“Uh, yeah, sure. Why? What’s the nineteenth?”

“She may be fine . . . I don’t know. But just be there for her, will you?”

“Of course . . . .” I had so many questions, but Damon slipped his glasses back on and turned away. 

I heard a final, “See ya ‘round,” as his window was sliding up, and then the truck started up and he was gone.

I stood there staring until the truck turned a corner and disappeared. 

As I slowly headed back up, my head was so full of questions that I felt a little out of it. The nineteenth was this Thursday. What the hell was significant about the nineteenth? Why did Damon want me to keep an eye on Nik? Had something happened to her on that day? 

I didn’t get the impression that Damon was kidding around. He really didn’t seem like he was a big kidder. But what was it he wanted me to watch for? I had no idea. It was driving me a little crazy.

Back in the apartment I went over and took another look at Nik’s army pictures. Sure enough, I spotted Damon in a couple of them . . . sporting that big, beaming smile he’d shown me. The smile that I suspected only rarely visited his face these days. “What the hell happened to all these people over there,” I wondered. 


	11. Chapter 11

I decided all the questions and uncertainty were going to drive me mad if I just hung around and thought on them, so instead I head out and did a bit of shopping before I had to get ready for work. I’d realized I had no sheets for my new bed. I hoped I could borrow a pillow and a blanket from Nik for now, but I really needed bedding.

I managed to find a couple pairs of sheet sets at a reasonable price, and then I picked up a few other things before I hurried home. I was pleased that I got my new bed made before I had to head off to work. It was small, but I figured it would work for me. 

As always, I kept myself busy at work, this time reorganizing a section of our storage area that was a complete disaster. The manager popped by when I was almost done. He told me once again how wonderful I was (I figured that went without saying!) and asked again if I’d be willing to take on more shifts. 

“If I had you around here more, I could probably get rid of two of those lazy bastards,” he grumbled. 

I couldn’t help but smile, but I told him I really couldn’t while I was in school. “Maybe over the summer?” I asked. He told me any time I wanted, which made me feel good.

I didn’t exactly rush home after work. I knew Nik wasn’t there, so I didn’t really see any reason to hurry. I got there about five thirty. Of course I frowned when I walked in and there were no yummy smells filling the apartment. Yeah, I was definitely getting spoiled.

I grabbed an apple, mainly because I didn’t have the ambition to actually make myself anything. I relaxed for a little bit, but then I grabbed one of my text books and started reading. I’d decided I’d study for an hour or so and then maybe think about getting something for supper.

I managed to focus, for the most part, although a couple of times I found myself wondering again about Damon’s words. It just left me shaking my head. I didn’t have enough information to ever begin to understand. It was frustrating.

Between focusing on my reading and pondering Damon’s cryptic words I became completely distracted. I suddenly looked around and noticed how dark the room was getting. The sun was setting! I couldn’t believe it. I jumped up, grabbed my coat and ran up to the roof. Sadly, I was almost completely winded by the time I got there. I really was in pathetic shape!

The sun wasn’t quite down yet, so I stood there panting, just soaking up the splendor of it all. I took another picture and sent it to Nik. In the text I just put, “Missing u.”

A couple of minutes later she texted back, “Do u mean missing my cooking?”

I smiled. She knew me so well. I responded, “That too.”

A minute later my phone rang. It was Nik.

“Hey,” I said.

“Hey. I’ve just got a second . . . we’re kind of busy . . . but I just wanted to hear your voice.”

That made me feel so good. Who doesn’t love to be wanted.

After a couple of seconds I heard Nik laugh and say, “That means you have to talk.”

I laughed too. “Okay, I will. Usually I’m sure you tell me I talk too much.”

“I’ve never said that,” Nik protested.

I just laughed at her. “Oh you’ve never said it, but I can see it in your eyes. You can’t hide things from me, Nicole.”

Nik was quiet for a second, so I took the chance to say, “Come on, you have to talk too.”

“Yeah,” Nik said quietly, and then after another second told me, “Hey, Liv, sorry, I have to go. Like I said, I just wanted to call and say hi.”

“And hear my voice, of course.”

“Of course.” I think I could hear the smile in her voice.

“I don’t want to keep you, so I’ll see you later.”

“Yeah, have a good evening. And actually make yourself something decent for supper, will you. I think there might be some of that chicken casserole in the fridge. I can trust you to nuke that without burning down the whole building, can’t I?”

“Hmph.” I managed to sound quite offended. “I’ll have you know I’m an expert at reheating things in the microwave. It’s one of my best culinary skills.”

Nik laughed softly. “Okay, Liv, I’ve really got to go. See you in a bit.”

“Later, Nik.”

I was smiling when she hung up. It was great to talk to her, but I still wished that she were actually there with me. I looked out at the rapidly darkening sky. There were just the last hints of dark pinks, fading quickly to purples, touching the clouds on the horizon. I found myself imagining Nik there, with her arm around me and my head on her shoulder. The thought made me feel quite warm and contented. 

I stayed up on the roof for a long time, even after it was dark, until I started to get chilled. I still had all those puzzling questions bouncing around inside my head, but I wasn’t getting closer to any answers. 

Back in the apartment, I took Nik’s advice and heated up some of the leftover casserole. It tasted just as good as it had originally.

It was eight by the time I’d finished up the dishes and tidied around the apartment. I watched a little TV – I wasn’t really in a state to concentrate on anything else – until I heard Nik’s key in the lock. 

I found myself bounding over to the door to greet her. I felt like a happy little puppy. When she opened the door and saw me standing right there, she gave me a huge smile.

“Hey, how are you?” she said.

“Great. How was your day?”

She let out a sigh. “It was long. These twelve hour shifts are killers.”

“Yeah, I bet.” I found myself grinning.

Nik gave me a suspicious look. “Why do you look like you’ve been up to something?” A look of horror spread across her face. “You didn’t blow up my microwave, did you?”

“No I didn’t,” I said and I gave her a little shot on the shoulder. Imagine her thinking I could be a hazard in the kitchen.

I casually walked over to the kitchen, giving her a smug little grin as I did. I stopped beside one of the drawers and turned to her. “I was cleaning up here in the kitchen . . . .” I paused and furrowed my brow. “Oh, wait, maybe you’re unfamiliar with what that means.”

This got a playful little scowl from Nik which got me grinning again.

“Anyway, as I was cleaning up – again! – I happened to look in this drawer . . . ,” As I spoke I slid open the drawer and reached inside. “. . . and you’ll never guess what I found.” I whipped out an ice cream scoop and held it up for her to see, like it was exhibit A at a murder trial.

My grin was getting even bigger. “So you see, I didn’t lose it,” I continued, “And I guess that means you owe me an apology.”

I continued waving the ice cream scoop around quite merrily as I spoke.

Nik was looking at it, then back to me, then back to the scoop. She had a huge grin on her face too. Finally she started to laugh. “That’s not my ice cream scoop,” she protested. 

I gave her my smug little smile. “Of course it is. It was right here in the drawer. I guess it was here all the time . . . you just didn’t see it.”

She was laughing quite hard now. I tried to keep myself under control, but soon I was laughing too. She came over and gave me a big hug. “Olivia Shaefer, you are such a goof! And a liar!”

“Oh, how dare you . . . ,” I started, but I couldn’t keep a straight face. I started giggling again.

After a few seconds, I casually slipped out of Nik’s hug and made my way to the fridge. “Since we ‘found’ your ice cream scoop . . . ,” – I used little air quotes – “. . . maybe we can find a use for it.”

I opened the freezer and produced a pint of Ben & Jerry’s Peanut Butter Fudge ice cream. Nik had mentioned once about having it and really loving it.

She had a huge smile on her face now. I think it was even bigger than the smile she gave me when she’d gotten home. I guess I knew how I rated! I might have seen Nik drooling a bit too. 

“Ice cream. Yum! And my favorite flavor. You have been busy today.” I think I got an extra appreciative look for getting the flavor right.

Her eyes went from me to the tub of ice cream. “So, are we going to eat it all?” That was her first thought, apparently.

“No,” I told her firmly. “Remember our diet.”

“I thought that was just for you,” she mumbled.

When I looked up at her she gave me a cheesy grin. I narrowed my eyes. “I heard that, you know.”

She just did her best to look all innocent, which of course made me laugh.

I grabbed a couple of bowls and put a small scoop in each.

When I started to put the lid back on the ice cream, Nik became incredulous. “Is that it? Really?” For a second I was afraid she might overpower me and help herself to the rest of the ice cream.

I looked down. The scoops did seem a little pathetic in those big bowls . . . even if they were probably a thousand calories each.

“Well, I guess you did work all day,” I conceded, and scooped her up some more. “Hey, I worked too,” I said and added another – slightly smaller – scoop to my bowl.

I put the ice cream away and we went over to the couch. Before we sat down Nik gave me another little hug – one handed, of course, because she wasn’t letting go of that ice cream.

“Thank you so much. This is really sweet.” I could see she really meant it. 

“I even remembered the flavor. Aren’t you impressed? See, I do listen to you when you talk.” 

I was particularly proud of myself for coming up with this plan. I figured it was just another little way to let Nik know how much I appreciated her. Plus – as an added bonus – it was really yummy.

I gobbled down my ice cream, almost moaning after every bite. It really was tasty.

When I set my bowl down and turned to Nik, I found her bowl was still half full. I looked up at her. “What’s wrong?” I demanded. “How can you eat it that slow?”

Nik just glanced at me as she lifted another tiny spoonful to her mouth and then slowly sucked the ice cream off the spoon. She let it roll around on her tongue until she finally swallowed it.

She gave me almost a snooty look and said, “Unlike you, I prefer to savor it.” She deliberately scooped up another miniscule amount and took her time cleaning it off the spoon. She gave me that same attitude as she asked, “Did you even taste it, shoveling it in that fast?”

I scowled. “Looks like no more ice cream for you.”

She gave a merry little laugh. 

“Next time, I’m just going to put two spoons in to the tub,” I told her. “That way I’ll get ten times as much as you.”

She laughed again. 

She was almost done now. She put a spoonful in her mouth, and then when she scooped up the last bit, she held it up to me. “This is for you, for being so sweet and thoughtful.” She grinned before adding, “And apparently for actually listening to what I tell you. I guess I’d better be careful. Who knew you were actually paying attention.”

She carefully put the spoon in my mouth. I closed my eyes and let them flutter as she slowly withdrew the spoon. “Mmmm,” I sighed, and then in a breathless voice added, “Oooh yeah . . . that was just the best . . . ever.” I let out a little orgasmic moan and fluttered my eyes again.

I was grinning when I opened my eyes. Just for a second I thought I saw Nik giving me a funny look, but then she smiled too.

Okay, maybe I was a little inappropriate. I guess I had definitely tarnished my sweet and innocent reputation. Oh, well, I suppose Nik had to see the real me at some point.

I gave her my best self-satisfied grin. “That was me savoring,” I told her.

“Now wasn’t that so much better,” she said, but she was busy gathering up the bowls and taking them over to the sink.

As I watched her, I realized that all of this had distracted me. Now I found my thoughts turning back to Damon and all he had said. I so wanted to just ask Nik about it, but I kind of felt Damon had said what he did in confidence. I assumed he felt Nik might not be thrilled about him mentioning anything.

I wondered if I could get answers another way.

As Nik was at the sink rinsing out the bowls, I said, as casually as I could, “Your friend, Damon was here this morning. He brought me that bed.”

She glanced over at me and smiled. “How was sarge?” I must have looked a little confused. “That’s what we always called Damon. That was his rank. And he was a great sergeant.”

Nik’s eyes wandered off, far away, just for a few seconds. I watched carefully, but the smile stayed on her lips. 

“So . . . .” I hesitated for a second, trying to decide if I should really be digging around in this part of Nik’s life. I desperately wanted to understand what Damon had said, though. He seemed to be trying to warn me . . . to tell me something about Nik . . . something that was potentially very upsetting to her. I was really just doing it because I cared about her. So I continued.

“So, you and Damon were in the army together, were you?”

Nik smiled. “Yeah, we served together in Iraq. His guys provided security for us and for . . . .” Her voice kind of trailed off and her smile disappeared. She suddenly looked so sad. It was heartbreaking to look at.

I stood to go over to her, but it seemed my movement snapped her out of it. She blinked and then focused on me. Her smile came back, but it looked a little melancholy. 

“Are you okay,” I asked. I couldn’t help but be concerned.

Nik was staring at me. I was a little unsure what to make of it, but I noticed her smile seemed to brighten, which made me feel better.

“Yeah, I’m fine,” she finally said. “Just some ghosts . . . .” She didn’t elaborate.

I was so tempted to ask if it was Sonja. I had this very bad feeling that maybe Sonja hadn’t made it back from Iraq. If her and Nik had been friends – especially good friends – I could only imagine how that might make her feel. I’d heard about ‘survivor’s guilt’, but I didn’t really understand it.

It occurred to me just how bad I’d feel if someone close to me – like Nik – suddenly died. I’d be devastated. And I suppose those people who were serving together were even closer. My heart just went out to her.

“What are you looking all upset about?” 

Nik’s words brought me back. It had been my turn to drift off. “Just thinking about something,” I mumbled. I didn’t want to lie to her – that really wasn’t my style – so I left it at that.

I suddenly perked up. “Hey, do you want to see my new bed? Damon set it all up, so you don’t have to worry about me stealing all your blankets tonight.”

I didn’t think Nik seemed all that enthused, but regardless, I grabbed her hand and dragged her to the bedroom – my bedroom. 

As I stood there, proudly showing her my new home, I kept talking. “Damon moved stuff around so we could get the bed set up. He doesn’t seem the kind to leave a job half done. I went out and got some new sheets – I hope you don’t mind, I borrowed the blanket and pillow we had on the couch. That’s when I got the ice cream and the scoop . . . ah, no, not the scoop . . . because it was in the drawer . . . yeah, I just got the ice cream.”

I don’t know why I was talking so much. I know I talk sometimes when I’m nervous, but I didn’t think I had anything to be nervous about. 

Nik seemed unusually quiet. She had a smile on her face, but it was a pretty neutral smile, and her eyes still seemed a little sad. I glanced over and wondered if she was looking at her drawings of Sonja. That would explain her mood.

But I had one more surprise that I hoped might cheer her up. I picked up a bag I had put in the corner and held it behind me as I came over to her.

“I’ve got something else for you,” I said. I was grinning, which I guess caught Nik’s attention . . . and maybe made her a bit nervous. “I know you’re going to miss having me around at night, and I know how wonderful I am to snuggle with – I’m sure you’ll miss that too. Just so it isn’t too hard to adjust, and so you don’t feel too lonely, I got you this.” I pulled a foot tall white, fluffy bunny out of the bag and held it up to her.

I really wasn’t sure if she was the stuffy type of person – I’d only seen one stuffy in her bedroom and that was a well worn orange cat that could have been hers as a kid. 

“You can call her Olivia – I think that’s a wonderful name – and if you’re sad about not having me there, you can snuggle up with her.”

Nik took the bunny and looked at it carefully. Then she turned her eyes to me. Now her eyes were smiling. “Oh, Liv, you are so wonderful.” She wrapped her arms around me and gave me a big hug.

She held me tight, for a very long time, like she didn’t want to let me go. After a minute or two I suddenly realized she was crying.

I gave her an extra little squeeze. “Nik, are you okay?” I was more than a little concerned.

I felt her head nod against me, and then she whispered, “I’m fine . . . really.” Of course then she snuffled and I was sure she was still crying, so I wasn’t at all that convinced.

I gave her a moment, but she didn’t say anything else, she just clung to me. 

“Nik, you know you can talk to me, right? About anything.”

I felt her head nod again, but she didn’t say anything. 

I just held her, ran my hands lightly through her hair and told her it was going to be okay. I decided that seemed like the best thing to do.

It took quite a while before she seemed to calm down. When we finally parted Nik seemed almost a little embarrassed. 

I gave her a stern look. “Don’t you be like that. It doesn’t matter what the reason is, if you feel like crying, then you let it all out.” My voice softened as I added, “And I’ll be here . . . if you want to talk . . . or if you just want to cry.”

That seemed to settle her a little.

I gave her a little grin. “After all, how many times have you had to deal with me crying on your shoulder in the last week or so? God, I think every time you saw me I was bawling. You must have thought I was just so pathetic. I’m surprised you didn’t just shoo me away.”

I tried to make light of it, and it seemed to be working. I saw a small smile appear on her face. She reached out, brushed her fingers lightly over my cheek and then put her hand on my shoulder.

Her eyes stared into mine and I could see her sincerity as she said, “Thanks, Liv. You’re a really good . . . friend.”

I stared right back at her, trying to let her know that my feelings for her were the same.

“I meant it,” I told her. “You can talk to me . . . about anything. I think you’re the one who was telling me how good it was for people to just talk about what’s bothering them. Didn’t you say it was therapeutic?”

She was looking at me so intently. Her mouth opened, like she wanted to say something, but then after a second it closed again. Instead she just gave me a tight lipped smile.

“She’s just so stubborn,” I thought. “She won’t even take her own advice.”

“I really mean it . . . anything . . . any time. Okay?” Nobody ever said I wasn’t persistent.

Nik just nodded and said, “Sure,” but she didn’t say anything else.

I think I might have been looking a bit frustrated, but maybe Nik didn’t see because she was glancing around the room. She looked over at the bed, and then back at me.

In a quiet voice she said, “Just because you’ve got your own bed, it doesn’t mean you can’t come sleep in mine . . . if you need to.”

I nodded and smiled. “I know.” Nik, even when she was feeling down, was always so considerate.

I glanced at my watch. “It’s getting late,” I told her. “I’ve got to work in the morning, and you’re going onto a night shift, aren’t you?

She nodded.

“We’d better get some sleep, then.”

Nik nodded again.

We got ready for bed. I gave Nik a big, good night hug and told her again to come to me if things were troubling her. I think she was starting to get my message – ‘I know something’s troubling you, so when you’re ready, come talk to me.’

I tucked Nik in – with her new friend, Olivia the bunny – and said good night. Then I headed to my own room and crawled into my very own bed.

I lay there for a while, but I wasn’t falling asleep. I had too much going on in my head, and, to be honest, I was too concerned about Nik.

Finally I got up and went into her room. I didn’t want to wake her if she was asleep, but I had a suspicion that she wasn’t. I stood by her door and softly called, “Nik?”

“Yeah,” she answered immediately. I guess she had heard me coming out of my room.

“I know you’ve got other Olivia now . . . but is there room in there for one more.” I’d decided that she had been so emotional all evening, maybe tonight wasn’t a good night for her to be alone.

She didn’t answer, she just tossed back the covers.

I crawled into her bed and immediately I felt her arms slip around me. It felt very natural, I had to admit.

After a few seconds she whispered, “Thank you.”

I turned so I could see her in the dim light of the room. I smiled when I saw she had the bunny lying beside her. “For what?” I asked.

She smiled. “You know what,” was her response. She leaned over and gave me a soft kiss on the cheek. “You really are a wonderful person, Olivia . . . .” I saw her smile widen. “ . . . and very, very adorable.”

I had to laugh. “Hey, you’re stealing my line,” I protested.

She gave me another little kiss on the cheek. “Too bad,” she said with some of her normal feistiness. 

It made me feel a bit better. I rolled back over and let her snuggle up tightly against me. I could soon hear Nik’s soft, steady breathing and I smiled because I knew she’d fallen asleep. I wasn’t far behind her.


	12. Chapter 12

I tried to quietly slip out of bed in the morning, but by the time I came out of the bathroom I could already smell a yummy aroma filling the apartment. Nik was up and she was cooking. I felt bad in a way – she did have to work a night shift later, so she really should have been sleeping in – but the way my stomach was rumbling, it was clear it was overjoyed that she was up.

I didn’t think she heard me coming up behind her, but when I cleared my throat to get her attention she didn’t jump or seem the least bit surprised. She turned and gave me a brilliant smile. “Good morning,” she said. Maybe she really did have ninja training.

She stepped over to me, gave me a quick hug and a little kiss on the cheek.

“Aren’t you supposed to be sleeping in?” I was using my stern, ‘mom’ voice.

She just shrugged and gave me a ‘you can’t tell me what to do’ look. “I just thought you could use a decent breakfast.” Now she was using the ‘mom’ voice. She stepped back up to the stove. Glancing over her shoulder she raised an eyebrow and asked, “Do you like French toast?”

My stomach gave a little rumble as a reply. Yeah, I loved French toast. 

“Besides, I can sleep while you’re at work.”

I nodded, but told her, “I only work until noon today.”

She looked over at me again and grinned. “Great. Then I can see you all afternoon.” She seemed genuinely happy about that. I’ve got to say, that made me feel good too.

Nik started flipping the French toast out of her frying pan and onto plates, and then brought them over to the table. 

I was just standing there being totally useless, so I poured us two glasses of orange juice and brought them to the table too.

“So this is part of my diet?” I asked playfully, as I stared down at the golden brown yumminess that was in front of me. My stomach was growling again, demanding my attention.

“Of course,” she said. “I’m sure the fruit I have to put on top is very healthy.”

There on the table she had sliced up strawberries and bananas. I noticed she hadn’t mentioned the syrup, but I didn’t bring it up. 

When Nik held out her hand I took it without a second thought. She was beaming at me and I’ve got to say, it made me feel good.

She kept her eyes firmly on me as she spoke. “I’m thankful for . . . you.”

I think I might have blushed a little bit. It was kind of unexpected. I looked down at the table shyly, but when Nik didn’t continue I glanced back up. She was still giving me that huge smile.

Finally I had to ask, “Is that it?”

She nodded. “Yes it is. I’m thankful for you.”

Now I was even more flustered, by her words, but also by her intensity. 

I was almost relieved when she continued. “I can go to a dark place sometimes . . . I was kind of there last night . . . but you were here, and you made it okay. You can’t know how much I appreciate that.”

So much for being relieved. I think I was turning even redder. I shrugged. “Really, Nik, it was no big deal. It’s not anything you haven’t done for me. It’s not anything you wouldn’t have done for any friend. That’s just what friends do. They’re there for each other.”

Nik finally turned her eyes away. She was looking down at the table, fidgeting with her fork. “I’m not really good at asking for help,” she admitted. “I’m not good at letting people help me . . . even when I know I need it.”

Her eyes rose up to mine again. “With you though, I . . . I feel something . . . .”

“Like a connection?” I offered.

She smiled and nodded. “Yeah, a connection . . . I just know I can trust you . . . I can . . . .” She hesitated again. She was obviously struggling to find the right words. I’d certainly been there.

“I can open up to you . . . be honest with you . . . tell you thing . . . .” She looked back down at the table. “Maybe not everything . . . ,” she said softly. She glanced up at me and had a strange, sad look on her face. She held my eyes for just a second, but then looked down again. She swallowed. “But I feel like I can tell you enough.”

I gave her a big smile and I gave her hand a squeeze. “You can tell me whatever you’re comfortable with . . . any time. If you need me . . . if you need someone, I’ll be there.”

I paused, and then I laughed. “Isn’t that the lyrics to a song . . .if you need me, I’ll be there?” I sang it, but I’ve got to admit, my singing voice isn’t exactly awesome.

Nik laughed too. “Well, if it isn’t, it should be.” Now she gave my hand a squeeze, and said, “Amen. Now eat up. You haven’t got that much time.”

I’d kind of been afraid Nik was heading towards another cry, but by the time she started eating, she seemed to be back to her old self.

After we were done, and I’d told her for the millionth time how good it had been, she even volunteered to clear away the dishes.

“Don’t get me wrong,” she told me with a little giggle, “This doesn’t mean I plan to wash them. I’m just clearing them off the table.”

I rolled my eyes. “Oh god, Nik, believe me, I’d never expect you might actually wash the dishes.”

I was running a little late, so I had to hurry. I brushed my teeth, gave Nik a big hug, told her to go back to bed – or else – and I was off.

\--------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------

Work went by a little slow. The store was pretty dead, and I didn’t have any projects to work on. Finally my shift was over, though, and I hurried back to the apartment.

I slipped in quietly, and was pleased to hear Nik’s soft, steady breathing coming from her bedroom. She’d actually listened to me. It was a miracle!

I noticed she’d listened to me about the dishes too . . . they were still there in the sink waiting for me. “Fair enough,” I thought. She had made me a yummy breakfast, after all.

When I was walking back from work, I noticed how unseasonably warm the weather was outside. I decided that maybe I was would go for a walk to the park, and I figured I’d invite Nik along, if she wanted. 

Then I had a brainstorm – why not make a lunch and take it with us. We could have a picnic and enjoy the sunshine, because no doubt we weren’t going to see too many more beautiful days before winter arrived.

I carefully pulled Nik’s door shut, so she wouldn’t hear me, and then went to work in the kitchen. I know, me in the kitchen sounds frightening, but I was keeping clear of anything hot or sharp. We had some tortillas, so I smeared on some cream cheese, added some sliced turkey luncheon meat we had from the deli, and then some sliced red peppers and dill pickles. I rolled them up and cut them into bite sized pieces. It was something my mom used to make, and I always loved them. I hoped Nik would like them too. 

I sliced up some apples, washed some grapes and cubed some cheese. When I had them all in zip locks, I emptied out my backpack and threw them in. I was just finishing up when I heard the bedroom door open and looked up to see Nik wandering out. She looked totally out of it, so I assumed she’d just woken up.

“Hey, there,” I called. “Did you have a good sleep?”

She gave me a nod. I didn’t think she was awake enough to give me any more, but she did manage to mumble, “Yeah, pretty good. How long have you been home?”

I just shrugged.

She must have been starting to wake up, because I saw a little bit of concern beginning to show itself on her face. “Uh, what are you doing?” she asked. Her tone was saying more though – probably along the lines of, ‘what are you doing in the kitchen and do I need to call an ambulance and/or the fire department?’

I, of course, felt offended. “I was making some lunch, and see . . . “ I held up my hand for her to inspect, “. . . no severed limbs, no cuts or bruises or trauma.” I half turned away, stuck my nose in the air and said, “I was thinking of sharing with you, but now . . . I’m not so sure.”

Naturally Nik just laughed at me. “You made me lunch . . . I don’t believe it.” She sounded very surprised . . . and maybe appreciative too.

“That’s more like it,” I thought, so I gave her a big smile. “Actually, I made us a picnic. It’s beautiful outside, so I thought we could walk over to the park and enjoy all this wonderful sunshine.”

I was hopeful that Nik would be into it, and she was. She thought it was a brilliant idea. It took her a few minutes to get ready – I was rushing her, so she was reduced to putting her hair in a pony tail and putting on a cap (it was camo and said ‘Army’, of course) – but soon we were on our way, laughing and enjoying the sunshine.

It was probably a fifteen minute walk to the park, but we just took our time, chatting as we went. It was nice to be out and doing something with Nik – I realized we really hadn’t since I’d moved in.

When we got to the park we found a nice sunny spot and spread out a blanket that Nik had grabbed. I laid the food out, including a couple of cans of Coke that I’d thrown in. I wasn’t a big soda drinker, but I’d noticed that Nik seemed to like her Coke.

The spot we’d picked was sheltered, so in no time we’d even peeled off our jackets. We lay there, basking in the sun, enjoying a leisurely lunch. 

Nik popped one of my tortilla roll ups into her mouth and said, “Wow, this is actually quite good.”

I furrowed my brow and gave Nik a little scowl. “ _Actually_ quite good,” I responded – with emphasis on the ‘actually’. 

Nik looked at me and held up a hand. “No, I didn’t mean it that way . . . I meant, it’s good . . . really good.”

I just laughed at her and grinned. “I’m glad you like it.” 

I was. It was about time I was able to make something for her. I was starting to feel like I was Nik’s ten year old child and she was the mom who had to cook for me all the time. Mind you, she really was a fantastic cook, and I certainly didn’t want to discourage her from making all those wonderful meals for me. I decided I should just keep quiet about the whole thing.

When we’d finished eating we just lay back on the blanket and enjoyed the sunshine. I was on my side, facing Nik. Her arm was right there beside me – the one with the full tattoo sleeve, and I found myself staring at it. I was fascinated.

“That’s really amazing,” I said as I ran a finger over the design. I glanced up at her. “And you designed the whole thing?”

She smiled and nodded. I could tell she was quite proud of that fact. I looked at it again and ran my finger over some more of the design, trying to take in all the intricate detail.

“You really are very talented,” I told her.

Nik just let out a little snort.

I looked up at her. “I’m being honest . . . you’re an amazing artist.” I looked down and ran my finger up her arm again. “This is amazing. And those other drawings I saw . . . they were amazing too.”

I was quiet for a few seconds while I let my eyes wander over the tattoos that covered her arm. I let my finger trace its way up her arm as I took in the various images. 

I looked back up at her. I got the impression she was watching me carefully from behind her sunglasses. “So how long did it take to get all this done?” I was really curious.

Nik shrugged. “I guess a year . . . probably a little more even. It took a while.”

“It wasn’t cheap,” she added. “but I found this really awesome artist and he did an amazing job.” I saw her looking down at her tattoos, and I saw a happy little smile spread across her lips. “It was totally worth it,” she said softly.

“Yeah, I bet.” I was so fascinated. I’d never actually taken a moment to really look at her tattoos. Now I couldn’t seem to take my eyes off of them. I think out in the bright sunshine, I could see even more of the detail. I just stared, letting my eyes run slowly up Nik’s arm, tracing my finger over the images and just feeling totally in awe.

“If I ever get a tattoo, can I get you to design it for me?” I glanced up at her. She was still staring at me. She reached out and brushed a strand of my hair back out of my eyes. I smiled and gave her a little, “Thanks.”

Nik nodded and said, “Sure . . . are you thinking about getting one?”

I just laughed and shook my head. I gave her a shy little look. “Honestly . . . I really hate needles,” I confessed.

“What?” said Nik, and she laughed. “You hate needles? It’s just a little pin prick. You barely even feel it.”

“I know . . . but I just . . . hate them.” I gave an involuntary shudder just thinking about it. I obviously couldn’t explain it.

“Oh Olivia, I never realized you were such a wimp,” Nik sighed, like she was shocked and heartbroken.

I gave her a poke in the ribs. “I am not a wimp!” I told her firmly.

She laughed and then turned her eyes back to mine. She stared at me for a moment, and then quietly said, “I know you’re not . . . you’re just too wonderful.”

I was smiling, but something about the way Nik said those words made me blush. 

My eyes fell away, but when I glanced back up I realized that Nik was blushing a bit too.

We just lay there quietly, enjoying the warmth of the sunshine . . . and each other’s company.

I heard Nik shifting. I somehow knew she was turning to look at me again. After a few seconds she said, “What if I actually designed something for you?”

I glanced at her. I could tell she was being earnest. 

I kind of wished she’d take her sunglasses off, because I couldn’t see her eyes. I found myself wondering what I’d see in them.

Finally I said, “Maybe . . . maybe I’d do it.”

Nik smiled at me. “Get a tattoo?”

I hesitated for a second, and then nodded.

“Even though you hate needles?”

I hesitated again, but then, again, nodded.

Nik just continued to stare at me, that happy little smile on her face.

I found myself blushing again, though I wasn’t sure why. I lay back down and closed my eyes. I was feeling so warm there in the sun that I rolled up my top so my belly was bare. I always loved feeling the warm sun on my bare belly.

We lay there quietly for a long time. It was a peaceful silence . . . not the strained kind you get with some people. I felt just so happy and contented. 

And I was relieved that Nik seemed to be enjoying herself. After Damon’s warning . . . and maybe a bit from the previous night . . . I was afraid that Nik was going to be a bit of a basket case for the next week. At least until the nineteenth . . . whatever that signified.

Some kind of bug landed on me and I reached down to shoo it away. As I looked down at my belly, a random thought popped into my head. “Sometimes I think I should get my belly button pierced.”

I glanced over at Nik. She was still there on her side, looking at me. “You should,” she said. “It would be cute.”

I laughed. “Cute! I was going for sexy.” I laughed again, and then another thought popped into my head.

I turned to Nik. I raised an eyebrow and excitedly asked, “Is yours pierced?”

She gave me a little grin. She reached down and slowly pulled her t-shirt up until the sun caught the glittering jewels in her belly button.

“Now that’s what I’m talking about,” I found myself saying enthusiastically. “That’s sexy.” 

Of course Nik’s stomach was flat and tight. Mine might have been a little softer. I was still sure I could pull it off.

“Hey, you know they have to poke a hole in there, right,” I heard Nik saying. I was sure she was making fun of me.

I just gave her a little grin as I stared at her bejeweled belly button. “I know . . . but I’m allowed to dream.”

We started chatting again. This was another example of just how little I knew about Nik, so I thought I’d practice my interviewing skills and see what I could find out. 

I learned that Nik was twenty seven, was born in March, had grown up on a farm in Nebraska and had two older brothers – like I’d seen in those family pictures. Her oldest brother had also done a stint in the army, but now both her brothers were back in Nebraska working the farm. Nik had been in the army for five years before she got out and started working at the VA.

When I asked her about boyfriends, she just gave me a funny look. I wanted to pursue it further, but before I could she demanded to know about me.

I told her I had an older brother and a younger sister, and that I’d grown up in Maine. 

“Maine? Is that even a state?” she joked (I think!), for which she got a none too gentle poke in the ribs.

“Yes, it’s a state,” I responded in a huff. “It was a state long before Nebraska, I’m sure.”

She gave me a little look, raised an eyebrow, and said, “Are you sure? Maine was part of Massachusetts for a long time, you know, before it became a state.”

Okay, I wasn’t sure sure. And that stuff about Massachusetts did sound familiar (how did she even know that?). I wanted to call her out . . . but I just didn’t know. I scowled at her and gave her a little growl in frustration. That just made Nik laugh.

When it looked like I was past my moment, Nik asked, “So how old are you anyways?”

Now I gave her a mysterious smile. “How old do you think I am?”

She shrugged. “I don’t know . . . eighteen or nineteen?”

I just continued to give her that smile. “Do I act like I’m eighteen or nineteen?”

She seemed to be thinking about that. She answered slowly. “No . . . I think most of the time you act more like you’re thirty or something.”

I almost had to laugh. For most of my life people had told me I acted much older than my age. Generally I thought it was meant as a compliment.

While I was congratulating myself on my maturity, though, Nik kept on talking. “Of course then there are other times when you act a lot more like a bratty six year old.”

“What!” I all but screamed in outrage. I jumped on top of Nik and started tickling her, shouting, “Take it back. Take it back or you’re going to regret it.”

Nik was giggling wildly – I don’t know if it was from my tickling or if she was just finding my little tantrum that amusing. Finally she grabbed my wrists and held them. Yeah, I wasn’t even close to being as strong as her.

Through her laughter she said, “Stop it. You’re causing a scene. Everybody’s staring.”

I gave her a smug little smile. “That doesn’t bother me. Does it bother you?”

One thing about me . . . causing a scene was not something that had ever bothered me.

Nik settled down. She just stared up at me. She was giving me a huge (adoring?) smile. “No, it doesn’t bother me at all,” she said quietly. 

I just sat there, straddling her stomach, staring down at her. Finally, in a pouty little voice, I said, “I think you’re the one that acts like a brat. So there.” I stuck my lip out to complete the look.

Nik gave a little tug on my arm and I tumbled off of her and back onto the blanket beside her. We lay there facing each other on the blanket, laughing.

Eventually we made it back to our conversation. I admitted that I was twenty. Nik, of course, thought I was eighteen because it was in my first year at college, but I had worked a couple of years after high school to earn money so I could afford to go to school without putting myself into huge debt.

“There you go . . . see how responsible that is. That’s why I said you seemed so mature.” Nik was trying to get back on my good side.

“Actually, I think you said I acted old . . . and then said I acted immature,” I corrected her.

She looked very tempted to respond, but obviously she was afraid she’d make me mad again . . . and I could see she lived in fear of my fury!

“So you don’t have a boyfriend at college?” she asked. I knew it would get there eventually. I just shrugged, and responded a little bashfully. “I only just started. I don’t really know too many people.”

“No prospects?”

Again I shrugged, although the truth was I’d met nobody who even slightly interested me.

“What about back home? Is there some high school sweetheart waiting for you back in Maine?”

I was getting even more bashful. Truthfully, I really hadn’t dated much in high school. My friends told me it was because I was too picky, but honestly, most of the guys I went to school with were either total idiots and losers, or seemed to be intimidated by me. 

This wasn’t anything I’d ever imagined telling anyone – I thought it made me sound like kind of a loser – but I shared it with Nik. It was hard. I didn’t look at her as I spoke. I mentioned that I had a couple of little flings – all of which I initiated. I’d slept with three guys a total of five times, but there was nothing that lasted any length of time. 

“So I’m not a virgin . . . you know . . . but I’m not exactly . . . .” 

When I didn’t finish the sentence, Nik did. “You’re not exactly a slut,” she said. 

I couldn’t help smiling at that, but from Nik’s voice, I thought she seemed a bit solemn.

I looked over at her – for the first time since I’d started telling her about my unimpressive sex life. I was a little nervous. I think I was afraid I’d see pity or something in her eyes. I honestly didn’t have any regrets. I didn’t think it was a bad thing to refuse to sleep with guys if you weren’t really at all interested in them.

But I couldn’t see anything in Nik’s face that indicated she was judging me in any way. When she saw me looking over at her, she just smiled warmly at me. After a minute she said, “Thanks. That’s not the kind of thing that’s easy for most people to share.”

I’d never planned to share that much, but honestly, I felt good about sharing it with Nik. It seemed like it just made us closer.

After a moment, I realized something. “Hey, wait a minute. I shared with you, but I don’t think you ever shared with me. Come on . . . it’s your turn . . . tell me all the juicy details.”

Nik seemed to go a little tense. I figured she wasn’t any more comfortable sharing the details of her love life than I was.

So I did my best to egg her one. “Come on . . . I bet all the guys were after you back in school . . . and in the army. What, there has to be, like, a hundred guys for every woman in the army, right?”

Nik just shook her head and said, “There isn’t too much to tell from high school . . . I was pretty messed up back then.”

She paused like she was remembering something. From the look on her face, it wasn’t necessarily a fond memory. 

And just my luck, that’s when the sun went behind a cloud and a sudden cool gust of wind blew in. I looked up and saw grey menacing clouds quickly moving in to fill the sky. It seemed our perfect afternoon was coming to a sudden end.

“Shit,” I said and glanced over at Nik. I grinned and told her, “This isn’t over.”

She just shrugged as if to say, “It’s not my fault,” while we gathered up our stuff and crammed it back into the backpack. 

We had our jackets back on and walked extra quick back to our place against a freezing north wind.

By the time we got back in our apartment, I think we were both frozen. 

Nik boiled some water and made us both a cup of tea. While I was waiting, Nik directed me to the linen closet where I grabbed a fuzzy blanket. I wrapped it around myself and curled up on the couch.

Nik brought the tea over and had to fight with me to get a share of the blanket.

She finally yanked the blanket right away from me. I glared at her and she glared right back, but then snuggled up beside me and wrapped the blanket around both of us. “We’ll warm up quicker if we share body heat,” she said. “Really . . . I learned that in the army.”

I gave her a wicked little grin. “I bet you did,” I said knowingly. I was surprised to see Nik’s cheeks redden. 

“Hmm, there must be a story there,” I thought, and then remembered. “Okay, you, enough delaying. Time to tell me all the dirt about you.”

She looked a little reluctant, so I reminded her, “I told you everything about my sad, pathetic love life . . . it’s only fair.”

She sighed, but then nodded. She took a sip of her tea. Her eyes were focused off, across the room, as she started to speak, and her tone was flat and emotionless. I immediately got the feeling that this was not going to be a happy story. I slipped an arm around her and pulled her closer, resting my head on her shoulder, trying my best to comfort her.

Nik took a deep breath, and then started, slowly. “I started early – way too early – and then kind of figured out that that wasn’t who I was. But funny thing, when you get a reputation, it can stick with you forever . . . especially in a small town like ours. 

“I didn’t even go out with a guy my last three years in school – and I certainly didn’t sleep with any – but people still seemed to think I was some kind of slut.” I felt her flinch when she said the word. I knew it must have hurt.

“I had a few good friends back then that helped me, but when I turned eighteen, I couldn’t wait to get out of there. Troy, my brother, was already in the army, so that where I went too. 

“In the army I had a few . . . relationships . . . but . . . .” She stopped, closed her eyes and took a deep breath. I wasn’t sure she was going to continue, but she did after a few seconds. “. . . but there was nothing that lasted.” She almost sobbed this last bit. 

“My god, what happened?” I wondered, but I didn’t dare ask. I knew she’d tell me, when she was ready. I just somehow knew it wasn’t the kind of thing I could – or should – try to push.

Nik just sat there, her eyes closed, taking deep breaths. I slipped my other arm around her and held her tightly. It took a minute or two, but she seemed to calm herself back down.

She finally opened her eyes. She looked down at me and I’m sure she could see the concern on my face. She gave me a brave smile and then gave my hand a little squeeze. She took another deep breath, took a sip of her tea, and then to my surprise, continued again.

“And since I’ve been out, well . . . I think you can see I’ve got a few issues I have to deal with. So I’ve had a couple of short relationships, a few flings, but nothing even close to serious.”

“But I’m still looking . . . for that right someone . . . .”

As she spoke, I saw her glance down at me . . . just for a second. It seemed a very intense, searching look . . . and then she turned away. She seemed a little . . . something . . . I really wasn’t sure. 

I wondered if she was like me, maybe just a little frustrated, waiting for that special person to come along and sweep me off my feet.

I continued to watch her carefully while she stared off. I still had Damon’s warning in the back of my mind. I found myself trying to gauge her mood. I wondered if it hadn't been all that brilliant for me to dig into her obviously painful past if she was in a particularly vulnerable place right now. I gave myself a little mental head slap, but what was done was done.

I gave her another big squeeze. “Hey, Nik, I just know the right person is out there for you.”

She turned back to me. I smiled. “Maybe for me too.”

It took a second, but then a little smile appeared on her face. It grew as she looked at me. She nodded. “Yeah, maybe,” she said. I saw her smile widen as her eyes drifted off. “Sometimes they’re closer than you think . . . right?”

I nodded and gave her another big squeeze. “Yeah, sure,” I said. Really, who knew.

It seemed both of our minds drifted off then. We sat huddled under the blanket, quietly, each of us in our own little world.

\--------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------

We hung out there the rest of the afternoon. It was very warm and cozy and a great way to relax and prepare for the week ahead.

Nik made a chicken stir fry for supper. She did let me chop a few vegetables, and I grated up a carrot. I was doing a stellar job . . . until I gouged my finger on the grater. It really, really hurt.

As I stood there, sucking on my bleeding finger, Nik went and got a bandage from the bathroom. Nurse Nik to the rescue!

There was a big gouge out of the side of my finger. “Eew!” Nik said as she looked at it. She turned her eyes to me, but instead of sympathy, I saw only amusement. “Does that mean there’s a chunk of you in with the carrots?”

I wasn’t seeing the humor in it. I gave he a cold look and said, “Don’t worry, I’m sure I taste just like chicken.”

That drew another, “Eew,” out of Nik and she wrinkled her nose in disgust. I’ve got to say, that made me smile.

We had an argument over whether broccoli belonged in a stir fry. “Go on the internet,” she reasoned, “and I bet you can’t find a picture of a stir fry that doesn’t have broccoli in it.”

I gave her my smug, knowing little smile. “Didn’t you know, Nik, you can’t believe everything you see on the internet. It’s a proven fact.” I scrunched up my face and added, “Besides . . . broccoli tastes gross.”

At the end of the day I discovered that the cook get’s the final say. Nik assured me that I could pick out the broccoli. I didn’t miss the fact, though, that when she served up my plate, there was a rather large chunk of broccoli sitting right front and center.

I gave her my best scowl, but she just laughed before she speared it off my plate and ate it down. As she did, of course, she made plenty of yummy sounds. You’d think she was back into the Ben & Jerry’s.

I washed the dishes after supper, and Nik actually helped. I noticed that she’d given up fighting my reorganization of her cupboards and drawers. “I see you’ve finally realized the logic of my system,” I commented. Nik just rolled her eyes, but she was still putting things away in the ‘proper’ place.

We made our nightly pilgrimage up to the roof, but the thick grey clouds had settled in, so there was no show to see. We only stayed there a short time, but that was enough to chill us. 

As we were heading back down, I shouted, “First one back gets the blanket,” and took off. My lead was short lived. Lucky for me Nik couldn’t resist my sad, pathetic looks and whining and soon welcomed me – not even reluctantly – under the blanket with her. We warmed back up and just relaxed and watched a little TV until Nik had to get ready for work.

“God, I am not looking forward to this,” she moaned as she came out of her bedroom in her uniform. 

I just grinned at her. “I bet all the guys at the hospital are,” I teased. “They’re probably all saying, ‘Oh boy, her comes sexy Nik. I think I need a sponge bath tonight.’” I laughed.

Nik sighed and shook her head, like maybe she was dealing with a difficult child. She tried to fight it, but a big smile slowly found its way onto her face.

“You are such a goof,” she said, and sighed again as if I was, perhaps, exasperating – instead of just being incredibly amusing.

She was just giving me the ‘what am I going to do with you’ look, when her eyes suddenly lit up. “Oh, just a second.” She headed back into her bedroom and when she returned, she was holding Olivia, her bunny. 

She gave it a big hug, like she was saying good night, and then handed it to me. In a very serious tone she told me, “I don’t think she should be alone, so I’m trusting you to take care of her, just for tonight.”

Now who was the goof. But I took the bunny, gave it a hug too, and in a very grave voice told Nik, “Don’t worry, I’ll take really good care of her.” I was happy to realize that Olivia now carried a faint scent of Nik on her. That made me smile.

Olivia and I both gave Nik a big hug, wished her a good night, and then saw her off. I curled up on the couch with Olivia nestled against me and watched a little TV. I went to bed quite early – I was thinking I was going to have a busy week at school. I had Olivia right there with me for my first night in my new bed.


End file.
